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Willsucceed's NC diary
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I HATE SPAM! Read Our Privacy PolicyPosted 3 months ago annabelleloka8
offlineMemberHey WS,
You have so many things to be grateful for I can see! BTW, do you have access to the books 'The Secret' and The Power? Everyone in the forum has been raving about it for a long time and its only last weekend I got hold of 'The Secret' in the most unexpected place here in my country. I go through their website practically everyday and read the testimonials and the book I read bit by bit every day and it uplifts me. I find that it keeps me company when I'm alone and it really is such a special friend. Get hold of the books. You wont regret it.Posted 3 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberAnnabelleloka8, yes I do have The Power. I have read the words and they enter my brain, but I haven't been able to assimilate them. I have the same problem with other things I've tried to read. Reading is not the same experience right now. It won't always be this way, and it will get better.
This did resonate as I re-read it after you prompted me with your question.
Every single second is an opportunity to change your life, because in any moment you can change the way you feel. It doesn’t matter what you have felt before. It doesn’t matter what mistakes you think you may have made. When you change the way you feel, you are on a different frequency, and the law of attraction responds instantaneously! When you change the way you feel, the past has gone! When you change the way you feel, your life changes.
I want this to be the case because I so very much want the past to be gone. I'll keep reading and re-reading the book until something works because I have to move forward emotionally and let the past be gone. It is gone anyway, so I need to change my feelings about it to truly let it go for me. I feel that I am bound until I do this.
I can do this.
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberOkay, I am going to commit to The Power.
I feel like I am stuck and not moving forward emotionally, even though I have other structures that are positive improvements in my life.
What are peoples' experience with how they started implementing this way of life and way of thinking? What were the first steps? Where did they get hung up and how did they resolve that?
I am particularly impressed that the book does not try and turn negative thoughts into positive thoughts, but rather replaces negative thoughts with new positive thoughts. That makes sense to me. I need to read it more now that I can take things into my brain.
Posted 3 months ago # -
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Posted 3 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberWow, I just had the most interesting experience. After posting my commitment to The Power, I called a friend from my divorce recovery group since I am particularly down today. Part of this anxiety/hurt stems from my recent organizing the pictures to be scanned.
In our conversation, I was saying how when the weather turns cold, I really want to cook and I cried when I came home last night to an empty house. We talked about cooking for one and I mentioned that I had just read to set the table for 2 and imagine the type of person you want to share your life with. She then said, "have you ever heard of The Secret?"
I am so excited. She followed the Secret for a year and said it did wonders. She fell off the bandwagon, so to speak, because of her breakup, but she is going to buy The Power and we're going to be buddies following it. I'm going to buy the CD for my car. She said she listened to The Secret all the time in her car and has the book that she read as well. She's glad to hear about The Power because she knows The Secret by heart after hearing it for so long.
We will share our vision boards, gratitude journals and positive thoughts with each other. I am so happy about this--not going it alone. I have this forum and a person here in town to work on my evolution to a happier and more fulfilled person.
I love the exercise I'm doing, the new friends I'm making, and my evolution into the power of love. My work has always been satisfying and I have some recent opportunities that have come up that I'm excited about. I'm so glad to be able to share this with you. Thanks for the prompt, Annabelleloka8!
Posted 3 months ago #-
annabelleloka8
offlineMemberHey WS, You're most welcome!Its abolsutely great you have a friend to share the knowledge of the power and the secret! I will get the power book on Saturday. Do you think we can share information, positive thoughts, our thoughts on gratitude to do with the power and the secret as forum buddies? I'm also a beginner and I try to digest a lot of what the books have to say. Your friend sounds like she had a lot of experiences with these books. It would be wonderful on getting to know a bit deeper into how she used this knowledge from these books.
I just cannot compare your recent post with those that you wrote a couple of weeks ago. You sound so upbeat, positive and lively; you are becoming a different person and i feel your life will change after reading and applying the knowledge in the books. The Universe has sent you a companion to help you along your evolution. Life definetly twists and turns towards the positive when you least expect it. You just have to apply the knowledge in the books. Be hopeful and dont despair.
Posted 3 months ago # -
randall
offlineMemberHi WS,
I read your story and your NC diary today and because our stories our quite similar I really wanted to see how you've handled this and what kind of progress you've made as I am fairly new into my evolution. I am inspired and motivated by your diary stories! Yes, you have your down days, but you've come a long way and you don't let the speed bumps throw you completely off track.Your hard work is paying off and you are evolving nicely! Way to go!
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberRandall,
I have a forum buddy who has made it to the other side already and she emailed me with this that I found very helpful. Thanks forum buddy out there!
Hi! There are going to be good and bad weeks. That's just part of healing. I'm so sorry that this is the rough week:(. It really does get better and just go with the emotions! It's healthy and you'll recover:)
You don't know if he's happy or not. But what you do know is that you can be happy without him! You may even meet someone that sweeps you away! The point is...he has limited his options to grow as a person by getting involved with someone else. You have all the advantages!! You may not see that right now but you will.
It really does get better! I was feeling the same and didn't think I'd ever be happy. You will get there!
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Posted 3 months ago -
sweetcalendula
offlineMemberHi Willsucceed,
What your friend shared in the email is true indeed! Can't agree more. You have all the options, tremendous supports and the plan with you to grow and change for the better. You are having all this time on your own, all by yourself to really evaluate things and evolve. You have all the pros here! Stick to your guns and you will find the right person at the right time. And the fact that you CAN be happy without him is undeniably TRUE.
Stay strong! Hugs.
Posted 3 months ago # -
Katniss
offlineInactiveWow WS, you are really rockin'n'rollin' lately with NC and your personal evolution.
Glad to know that you have someone in real life who can also be there to go thru this experience with you. Just like people need physical exercise buddies, I guess we all need emotional exercise buddies, too. Do some reps of positive affirmations together and see how far you both can go when supporting one another.
Love the idea of burning away the past and releasing those old feelings that way, too.
You're doing great!
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberFirst steps today were to park my car on one side of the garage, ditch wearing my old T-shirt to bed for something prettier, and also took the "5 love languages" quiz. I will use the words of the results of the quiz on my vision board. Had gratitude for fall tree colors, the wind in my face as I ran, and a wonderful place to work.
This week was a good training week. Monday was 3 miles faster pace, Wednesday was normal pace 6.5 miles and today was normal pace 5 miles. Will swim and bike tomorrow, eat a late lunch with a friend, have people over for dinner, run on Sun morning, eat lunch with another friend, and perhaps bike in the afternoon.
Posted 3 months ago # -
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Posted 3 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberI have a few words and a couple of pictures gathered together for my vision board and I need to buy the actual board to begin constructing it. Had full days yesterday and today and I should be tired enough to sleep well tonight. Today I ran 6 miles, biked 13 miles, swam, and walked my dog out at the lake. The 13 mile bike ride was to mark out the path of where a 13 mile run will end as I continue to prepare for the 1/2 marathon in the spring. Surely that will give me some rest tonight.
I bought something to prepare in my crockpot just for me to eat tomorrow, which is a first. So far my firsts in the kitchen have been cooking for company. The next first will be baking something, which I love to do, but that has its own emotional ties. Tomorrow I'll sign up to supply treats for the divorce recovery group two weeks from now. I already know exactly what I'll make.
Had gratitude for bright sunshine and beautiful weather for running and biking, the gorgeous sunset on the lake, the fishing boat that made the lake sunset picturesque, and new friends.
For those of you interested, I found PinkChinchilla's NC diary helpful.
Posted 3 months ago #-
Pixie
offlineMemberHi WS!i love that quote, you are finding strength in yourself i can tell & are doing well
baking is like therapy its something i have started to do every week & i love the feeling of creating something myself from scratch - it helps that it also tastes yummy!! You are facing the memories of your past & rebuilding new ones in your present, thats really hard i know but you are doing it & it will help you evolve even further xx
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Posted 3 months ago sanity_fair
offlineMemberHey ws! I love that quote from Marcus Aurelius. Just goes to show that the mind is indeed the master of operations. And this was known in the ancient times!
I'm glad you're sharpening your cooking skills. I myself have learned a few culinary things in this journey. Next up is baking! I'm weening myself off sugar for a few months now so it's going to be tough. Well, maybe not.
Wish I could see your vision board.
Hope is not the conviction that something will turn out well but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out.
Vaclav Havel, Disturbing the PeacePosted 3 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberScott said to dane:
You are worth more than what they gave you, but until you believe that, you will never get what you deserve.
I am just realizing this while I gather items for my vision board and as I explore things about relationships in my divorce recovery group. This is what is powerful about the vision board to me. It weeds out what is important, and that means I am saying what I deserve, because I'm worth it (to steal a great line from Loreal). I am worth it and I have a lot to offer someone that is worth the time and effort.
"The Power" changes your perspective about noticing things you want for your life. You learn to flip the perspective so that you are in tune with your emotions instead of fighting them. For example, when you feel envy for what someone else has, you realize that you are telling yourself that is something you would like for yourself and you welcome that information/insight into yourself. You can still take time to reflect on and prioritize this information, but the initial input you treat as helpful information instead of negative emotions.
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMembersanity_fair said:
I'm weening myself off sugar for a few months now so it's going to be tough. Well, maybe not.Perhaps you can think of it as cutting back on the enormous excess of sugar that is in most of our diets instead of weening yourself off sugar. I'm saying this because it seems to be the same perspective as "getting over him" versus "getting over the dead relationship". With sugar, you don't expect to never eat sweet things again, but because there is a huge excess in the foods we eat, you are adjusting it to normal and more tasty levels. You want to actually be able to taste good food much better without the overload of sweet added in. The adjustment takes some effort, but the end result is great for taste as well as your body.
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Posted 3 months ago -
willsucceed
offlineMemberannabelleloka8, Hi. I have three words printed out from the "5 love languages" that are important to me in relationships. I have two pictures of what I want my living to look like (it's bare now). I also have a picture of the car I want. I have a job announcement of my dream job, although I do really like the one I have as well. I want to find some pictures that go with the words "quality time", "words of affirmation", and "physical touch".
It's snowing the first time this winter tonight, so I'll get that first over with. I'll be scooping snow by myself in the morning for the first time, which is not trivial since I have a looooong driveway. However, my arms are pretty strong from swimming and I'm in better shape, so that should be much better.
This weather is going to force me to learn to be happy at home by myself, I can tell. Lots of firsts to get through.
Posted 3 months ago # -
annabelleloka8
offlineMemberHey WS,
I chose a yellow board to symbolise happiness and joy for the background. On the centre of the board, I plan on pasting my own picture and around that, I will paste words that already desribe me and also what I want to become. So for example, I've cut out words such as blessing,beautiful, charming, positive, confident, happy. These words really struck me searching through the magazines so I want to paste these. Around the corners of the board, I've pasted picture of a Rado watch that I really want, a trip to Europe ( pasted pictures of london and Italy), my ideal relationship and 'how' I'd like to feel in that relationship ( I've chosen pictures of couples frozen in the moments of love which I want to feel), and I also want beautiful skin so I pasted some words from the mag such as 'beautiful gorgeous skin' and beautiful skin comes naturally'. Also, I've pasted pictures of meditation, spas, spa getaways and lovely homes and interiors of what sort of environment I'd like to be in and what sort of home I dream of. I'm also planning to put up pictures of cash and money as I want an increase in my monthly salary from my job.Its a long task looking for the pictures which I really want and I'm only pasting things which really stand out to me and the pictures which really appeal to me so Its gonna take some time. I add something everyday to the vision board looking through the magazines and I enjoy it so much when I'm creating it. I feel like I'm creating my life.
BTW, have you seen the secret website? There are two free ebooks which you can download: The Science of getting Rich and The Master key System. The Master key System has some great information on visualisation and affirmations which you can have a read through.
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Posted 3 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberI signed the papers for the sale of the house today. It closes later in the month when I will be out of town. It is great to sell that house, of course. It also hurts--yet another step forward toward the divorce. I filed for the divorce and want the divorce, but of course it's not my choice in the beginning to be going in this direction.
I feel tired and lonely right now. I'm still having a hard time that he had the past 1-3 years to cultivate a new relationship and jump from me to her with the end of the marriage. I compare myself to him and see I am struggling through my feelings while he is enjoying the fun of a new love.
I know I have so much to be grateful for. I have lots of opportunities related to work. I have made some great new friends and rekindled relationships with other friends. I have improved my health and really enjoy my new exercising. I appreciate my divorce dog companion. I am learning about what I want and have an opportunity to find a truly satisfying relationship in the future.
I don't feel free yet, even with these steps forward (sale of house, soon to be divorce, letting go of my feelings for dead relationship). It is especially the letting go of my feelings for the dead relationship that is causing me a lot of stress. I wish I could have gotten over that by now and surely it can't take much longer. I long for indifference and feel that I'm doing all the steps to get there but can't understand why it has to take so long. Surely it can't take much longer. I've seen it happen in other people's forums and that gives me great hope, I just want it for myself.
Posted 3 months ago #-
Pixie
offlineMemberWillsucceed you are doing great, it's hard not to pressure ourselves to reach our goals quicker but each day is a test of our strength & willpower to get to the stage we really want to be at, just be patient & believe that happiness will come your way & you have nothing to lose! Take one day at a time, this process requires baby steps but we will all get there in the end & we are all here to support each other!
Stay strong & focus on the happiness you have gained in ur life already & even more will come ur way xx
Posted 3 months ago # -
break222
offlineMemberwillsucceed, like pixie said "patience is key" and taking it one step at a time is the only way you can reach your destination. Think about the last ten years. You evolved and changed each year a little bit and same thing with this kind of evolution. Stay focused!
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Posted 3 months ago willsucceed said:
he had the past 1-3 years to cultivate a new relationship and jump from me to her with the end of the marriage. I compare myself to him and see I am struggling through my feelings while he is enjoying the fun of a new love.When you compare yourself to him, there is no comparison. He is a fucking coward, and you are not.
Like you pointed out he had 3 years to plan his next move, you didn't.
Just be glad that the truth (about him) is out, and you are now free to find true love.
I truly believe that these things that happen to us happen for a reason, a good reason.
Take solace in the fact that you are on your way to the destiny you deserve.
Society is at fault more than anything for the amount of failed relationships, why?
Because they insist on dictating social time tables for women...they should be married at this age, must have kids by this age...blah, blah, fucking blah!
Men really don't live by these time tables, we just kind of go along with it to make the women happy, and therein lies the problem.
You have the blind leading the blind while being pushed by their peers to do something by a certain time.
I was never aware of this until I started offering support for people going through breakups, and I see the same pattern over and over again.
A female gets married and it sends all their single female friends into a frenzy because they feel that they are falling behind the social timetable for a "lasting" relationship, or a family.
Peer pressure is a big problem in our social world, and in just about every culture.
When I look back at all my failed relationships the biggest problem was moving too fast, and saying things without any meaning behind them...like, I love you.
There are so many levels of love, how the hell do we know which level we are on, or if both people are on the same level?
There is really no way I can think of, that is why love is a risk, but a life without risk isn't a life at all, it is a prison of fear.
So we have to take risks, which is bad enough without society and our peers shoving us forward, whether we are ready or not.
Divorce is not a failure, it is a natural byproduct of our societies need to tell everyone what to do.
I fucking hate that!
My point is that no one should blame themselves (entirely) for a failed marriage/relationship, but they should be held accountable for how they choose to end the relationship.
Whatever happened to honesty?
When a person says they have doubts about getting married they are told they have "cold feet"...WTF?
Cold sweats is more like it.
Maybe, just maybe, they are trying say this isn't what they really want.
But does anyone listen to them?
Then they tell the groom to get drunk and go through with it because it's too late to back out now...great advice.
People, don't blame yourselves for breakups, they are the only way we can learn from our mistakes, and we all make those kind of mistakes.
Maybe we should be learning how to Kick Society's Ass too?
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
Learn How to Create The Destiny of Your Choice
FREE Step-by-Step BREAK UP SURVIVAL PLANPosted 3 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberadmin said:
When you compare yourself to him, there is no comparison. He is a fucking coward, and you are not.Like you pointed out he had 3 years to plan his next move, you didn't.
Just be glad that the truth (about him) is out, and you are now free to find true love.
I truly believe that these things that happen to us happen for a reason, a good reason.
Take solace in the fact that you are on your way to the destiny you deserve.
SW, thanks. I laughed out loud at your first sentence, which helped tremendously. With all the evidence laid before me, it amazes me that I still hurt and have feelings for the dead relationship. It's like there is a disconnect in me, which I know is causing me stress. However, the stress is less by no contact and the things I'm doing to get my life back.
I cut out the phrase "Don't Give Up" that was in some mail I received today for my vision board.
Posted 3 months ago # -
Katniss
offlineInactiveDon't be too hard on yourself, WS...
Remember, you spent a large part of your life with this person; he was making a long term exit strategy for himself and you were blindsided as a result. Of course it will hurt for a while, because he was significant in your life, BUT the difference is you aren't wasting any more needless time; you are taking the steps to get YOUR life back.
AND... it's only been about a month, right? You've done so much in one month already, just think what two months will look like, and then three, four, five... until you just about have to check page 1 of your NC Diary to see just how long it actually has been. It's a great feeling when you have to count back on your fingers to "oh yeah, that was the break up date... right, I lost track".
Your vision board is such a great idea, too. I had a friend years ago who planned out her whole "happily ever after", and I'll be damned.. every last thing happened at exactly the time she predicted it would!
Words of affirmation are great to do as emotional exercise reps every day. "Don't Give Up" is a great one.
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberI had a good business trip to the east coast last weekend. I worked with people I really enjoy and was able to get some good running and swimming in while traveling. I'm at the point now where I have small crying spells here and there, and am sad with those, but not the overwhelming grief like before. I am sleeping better at night, but still not great.
I have a lot of work to get done and am still not at full capacity, but have times when I can be productive. Exercising helps tremendously with sad and anxious feelings and I also enjoy it for itself. That has been a great improvement in my life. I'm still making friends, and opportunities related to work are going well.
I finally bought two boards for my vision boards today and will begin putting what I've gathered on those. One is professional and one is personal. I'll report more on that once I get them constructed. I haven't reached indifference yet and still very much look forward to reaching that goal. I also am increasing my gratitude and positive thoughts each day, but still dwell on things I'd rather not think about.
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Posted 3 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberIn looking to the future and reading about relationships, I've come across some interesting materials. I've taken the "5 love languages" questionnaire, Strengths Finder questionnaire, Meyers-Briggs (already knew this one), a conflict resolution questionnaire, and read Dr. Harley's "Love Bank" principles and will take his "emotional needs" questionnaire.
I'm looking into these through my divorce recovery group and also with my own searching. I really want to understand myself and what builds a successful and rewarding relationship as I plan for the future. I am learning a lot about what causes relationships to succeed and will use what I'm learning in building future fulfilling relationships.
Posted 3 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberOkay, I have a question. How do I go about throwing out things that have emotion attached to them, but yet not throw away my life at the same time? We spent a lot of years together and I don't keep a lot of stuff, but I do have photos (I'll keep those), letters he wrote to me the summer before we got married, cards, and some things that were gifts from him from over the years. I don't want to just throw away everything that has to do with him because our lives were intertwined significantly since I was 17 and I would be throwing away part of me as well. But I don't want to keep anything that hinders my evolution. How do other people make these decisions?
I left the box of his items like this (scans of pictures, his school pictures, cards, some papers from college, etc.) at the attorney's office and they will take it his attorney to give to him. I actually felt relief at finally getting that in order and out of my hands.
Posted 3 months ago # -
annabelleloka8
offlineMemberHI Willsucceed,
You dont need to throw these things away if you dont want to. Just keep them locked away in a box or something somewhere like your attic or in a cupboard. By the sound of your note, these are things which have a very high emtoional value, so if and when you lock them away, dont be tempted to look at them again. I personally couldnt keep valuable keepsakes like handwritten letters and pictures together that would remind me of the past and what used to be. This is the moment of now, in the present, where I am developing myself into a new person so stuff like this would drag me down the past time and time again. But this is just my opinion.BTW, sorry to sound harsh but I guess he doesnt really consider how 'your lives were intertwined for such a long time since you were 17' like you do. Otherwise, he wouldnt jump into another woman's arms at the blink of an eye when the opportunity presented itself. Your evolution and wellbeing matters more than anything right now. But again, this is my opinion, you know best.
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Posted 3 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberI have come to realize that everything I'm doing now is just between me and my feelings. He's out of the picture and was happy to end and get out of the relationship. What I'm working on now is separating myself from my feelings for the dead relationship and out-of-date dreams of the future.
I want to take the action step of getting rid of things related to the dead relationship, yet not be precipitous and throw everything away since it is my life history as well. The pictures and paper items are all in 2 boxes on shelves in the basement. I think I'll take the first step of gathering the other items that were gifts or have some emotional significance and put them in a box and then try and figure this out. At least I'll have cleaned them out of my regular living space. I don't want to keep things that prohibit my evolution, but I also don't want to erase myself out of my own history.
I'm happy to report that my butterfly swim stroke classes are going well. I have been able to combine the arm and leg movements together and she just had me start lifting my head to learn how to breathe. I've kept my longest running distance at 6.5 miles since one knee feels irritated after I did some speed work. I can't wait to increase to 7 miles, but will be patient.
Went out to dinner with friends. Didn't appreciate the music playing in the restaurant (still bothered by that), but had a good meal and conversation. Will go out again to dinner tomorrow now with my divorce recovery group. My bicycling partner is getting over a bad cold, so I'll bike that trip solo.
How is the move going, SW? Did you reach that "I want to throw everything I own away" stage yet?
Posted 3 months ago #-
willsucceed said:
How is the move going, SW? Did you reach that "I want to throw everything I own away" stage yet?The high speed internet was activated this afternoon, so we will start moving in tomorrow.
The people who rented before us smoked when they weren't supposed to so the place smells like cigarette butts, and air freshener (gag).
We don't have much stuff to begin with.
When we moved from Denver to NYS we only took what would fit into a ford windstar along with 3 people.
We will be using that same van to move two miles across town.
The only thing that sucks is that I will have to take apart the elliptical machine so it will fit in the back of the van...again
I had to do that the last time we moved last November.
Uhaul was going to cost us around $70 so we decided to just make a few trips with our van instead.
Renting sucks, the place we have now is month to month so we could be moving again on a 30 day notice...real comforting.
I can't wait to own my own land and home.
This is one step closer to making that happen.
That's why we have to...
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
Learn How to Create The Destiny of Your Choice
FREE Step-by-Step BREAK UP SURVIVAL PLANPosted 3 months ago # -
mamasteez
offlineMemberwillsucceed said:
I want to take the action step of getting rid of things related to the dead relationship, yet not be precipitous and throw everything away since it is my life history as well. The pictures and paper items are all in 2 boxes on shelves in the basement. I think I'll take the first step of gathering the other items that were gifts or have some emotional significance and put them in a box and then try and figure this out. At least I'll have cleaned them out of my regular living space. I don't want to keep things that prohibit my evolution, but I also don't want to erase myself out of my own history.I like this because I think it's essentially a key to evolution. Putting things away and/or getting rid of them stop you from being reminded of it all. I just had done the same thing because before I had privated pictures online because I had so many to delete/rid of. I took my time and tested my patience this evening, and just deleted them. (I also found out even if they are set so you could only see them, people tagged can see them also -_-) Anyways, these pictures were nonetheless still tagged, and I got rid of them (online anyways).
Don't you feel a cleansing coming upon you? Cause I certainly did. Hiding them away somewhere you're never going to look for awhile is probably a good idea. I totally understand about "erasing" your history, but you're not erasing it, you're just moving on from it. You're growing and evolving as you should. These memories in that box are just that, memories. Though, maybe years from now you won't exactly remember what they were... but you know, you will still have that because it is what brought you to what you are today - good & bad. You'll always have it with you, even without the physical evidence.
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberThanks Mamasteez. I will keep the pics in 2 boxes and then everything else in a separate box. All that will be downstairs on a shelving unit that I don't frequent. I think it will be clear later on what I will throw away, and it may be all of the boxes except for the pics, and I may seriously weed out the pics later on.
I received a notice in the mail that he has sent a box; I'm assuming the forwarded mail and some things from the house that closes tomorrow. I'll pick it up and not open and on the shelves it goes until I decide to deal with it much later on.
Receiving the notice put me off kilter today. Thank goodness I don't have contact with him because it just throws me completely off. I was crying while running, which can be a challenge in breathing. Divorce date should be soon; we are getting the last of the wording agreed upon. I'll be glad when the divorce is final, although I'm sure that will be an emotional day as well. Give a big talk at work once I get back from Thanksgiving break. It's like so many things are happening all at once in my life.
Posted 3 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberI have the court date for the divorce and we are agreed on the final document, from what I understand. The court date is in the middle of December, so the divorce will be just about 5 1/2 months since he left, which is pretty good. On the day of the divorce I will buy a new phone with a new phone number and therefore be rid of the texts we had that I haven't been able to delete yet due to content of the conversation. I will also delete all emails. Things will have already been moved into the basement, so no more house things to get rid of. I do have some physical paperwork that I will burn that day as well. I have someone to go with me to the divorce and then we are going for a long run--to a new distance for me which will be very satisfying. At that point it will be either 7.5 or 8 miles. Also, I have dinner with my friends from the divorce recovery group lined up and then we have our meeting that night as well. Other friends are ready to talk on the phone at night, so that day is completely filled up with friends and family. I will make sure to have an extra long swim early the next morning and then plan some other fun things for the next day.
I anticipate relief and grief that will turn to mostly relief that includes freedom to put some plans in action that I'm waiting on now.
Posted 3 months ago #
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