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Success Update: Stay Strong
(6 posts) (6 voices)-
Kick-Loves-Ass
Posted 5 years ago -
Leeka
offlineMemberI wanted to follow up with my success story from quite awhile ago.
I joined this forum over 2 years ago, after my boyfriend (of two years at the time) broke up with me after a serious fight we had.
I was crushed and searched online to find any kind of advice I could to help me get through the night. I found this site and it helped me put the situation into perspective.
On September 26th of this year, I got married to the same man who had broken my heart all this time ago.
We had a very long engagement and never broke up again after reuniting. Our break up lasted exactly 2 months and I stayed in no contact (after breaking it twice) for the majority of this time.
I know this website helped me "get my ex back", which is why I still check in every now and then. I read through the no contact diaries and can feel the pain the writers are experiencing because it is the exact same pain I went through.
I know that no contact works because it led me to the conclusion that brought my ex back to me:
I realized, through this forum nearly 3 years ago, that if my ex didn't come back I would be okay. I got myself out of bed and started doing things. I put him out of my thoughts, knowing that I would rather have him wonder (if he was going to think about me at all) about what I was doing, instead of giving him the power of knowing that information by breaking no contact, especially when it wasn't going to be reciprocated.
As soon as I moved on emotionally and mentally, he came back into my life. He has never left since that day.
Our break up was serious. He was never coming back and I was forced to face the fact that I may have to live through another failed relationship. I have always thought each person I was with was "the one" so each break up I have ever endured has been painful. I thought, at the time of our break, that I was doomed to repeat a horrible cycle that always ended horribly. I had to question if I was upset over losing him, or just upset over losing the relationship. Even after we got back together, I made sure I knew the answer to that question before I agreed to marry him. He is "the one."
Once we made the commitment to give it another try, and to stick it out through thick and thin, we have never wavered. The happiest day of my life was speaking our vows to each other, a very surreal experience as I think back to what I almost lost all that time ago: both myself and the love of my life.
The bottom line is that Scott's message, and that of this site, is truth. If you want to kick love's ass, then you have to shift your focus back onto yourself. Stop making it a contest to win back the affection of another person. Realize that you have complete control over everything, including how you feel in this very moment. You can't control the actions of another person, but you can control how you react to adversity.
Once you show that you have complete control over your own happiness, then you will become a magnet and attract all the love you could ever want, and in almost all situations, from the person you want it from the most. It is not something that can be faked; although, it is possible to "fake it til you make it." Therefore, breaking no contact just to say you have moved on is self-defeating. It has to be shown and believed - by both parties.
Both my husband and I come from broken families, so we have very realistic views of the fact that marriages don't always last. But, as of today, I have complete faith in the fact that the break we had was necessary and a crucial part of our history as a couple. No matter what the outcome of your relationship. you will come out on top if you shift your focus entirely back to yourself.
Posted 5 years ago # -
Leeka said:
On September 26th of this year, I got married to the same man who had broken my heart all this time ago.Congratulations Leeka!
You truly kicked loves ass!
Thanks for coming back and sharing your story.
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
"If you don't think finding true love is worth risking a broken heart, then, you don't deserve it."
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Click Here to LEARN "ADVANCED RELATIONAL SKILLS" TO GET YOUR EX BACKPosted 5 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
If you really want to know how he feels, and you really want him to know how you feel - talk to his heart.Posted 5 years ago -
congratulations! I am happy for u!
God grant me the serenity to accept things that I cannot change....
The first step toward change is acceptance.
Change is not something you do, it's something you allow.
Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you.Posted 5 years ago # -
Tango
offlineMembercongrats Leeka. That was so inspiring! You deserved it all the way. NC reveals whether our ex's are in actuality what we loved them for and believed them to be.
Posted 5 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
If you miss her "real bad", and you want to get your ex-girlfriend back, you need to take a look at this.Posted 5 years ago
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