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KitKat's No Contact Diary
(47 posts) (9 voices)-
Kick-Loves-Ass
Posted 2 years ago -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberAlright! This is my first day of no contact,
today was pretty useless (my fault), the only thing that makes me feel way better and takes the pain away is to read success stories and manuals on how to get ex back (I've read so many of them) since I was on this situation a year ago same boyfriend. I've never posted anywhere though but since I read MelanieStryder's diary on this website I couldn't help myself, I suggest you go and read it it has empowered me to seek for help.
Moving on to another topic I am not 100% sure of what I am allowed to post on my diary or not anyway.
Moving back to my no contact, I started it yesterday right after the breakup, (We broke up over the phone on Wednesday & I saw him last yesterday which was the next day just to kinda get all my stuff from his house and he wanted to break up in person and say he is sorry and bla, it was terrible I regret going) today is the first day no signs from him obviously yet. I hope this works. It has to I'm confident it will.
For now I need to force myself to focus on my life.
Thank yous for reading =)
Posted 2 years ago # -
lucylou
offlineMemberWelcome KK!
Well done for joining, just read your break up story and reminds me of mine as we are a similar age and my ex I think basically broke up for same reasons, although he didn't really know why at the time. It sounds like your ex is having a little bit of a quarter life crisis and freaking out about his freedom being gone, I see so many break ups after 3 years and I think that's the point where things start to get pretty serious and it either makes or breaks it.
Me & my ex have been broken up almost 5 months now and been on the forum around 4, I have realised so much since then - and have really noticed how many people our age are all over the place and confused/lost about their lives.Some people are ok at this age and are settled but they may have this freak out phase later on, I dont know. I just have really started to notice even my guy mates with long term girlfriends freaking out about the future, cheating and a lot of relationships breaking up etc.
This forum is definitely the best choice I ever made and Im sure it will be for you too, I feel so much happier now with myself and in general. I feel like I get life more and want to live life to the fullest now
The no contact is so hard but you soon see the benefits and when I look back to how I was when I first joined I am amazed, I couldn't have got to where I am now this quickly without this place. One thing I will say is it teaches you patience, sometimes days feel long at first and you cant stop thinking about it all but getting through all that makes you so strong its amazing. NC is the best thing for you to come off best from this situation, people really miss things when they don't have them anymore remember that. I am glad I didn't emotionally react to things even when I wanted to scream down the phone at him. It helps you realise so many things.
I really thought I would want my ex back no matter what, up until the 2/3 months mark (no clue as lost count) but now after I saw him at a mutual friends party, it made me realise how immature he still is and how much he needs this space to just grow up. I also need the space and I dont want to be with someone who is such a confused mess, I am looking forward to living for myself. I still love him so much but I know we cant be together and I wouldnt want to be.
Sorry for rambling on but welcome and we will all support you here
come here if you ever worry about breaking NC so we can make sure you dont. PM me if you ever need to!
Make yourself as busy as you can and spend time with your friends and family big hugs KK hope you are doing ok!
PS: I also literally read success stories every single night over and over to help myself through it - they really did help alot it keeps you motivated to carry on - Melanie Stryders was my fave too - her diary is so positive and inspiring!
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
If you really want to know how he feels, and you really want him to know how you feel - talk to his heart.Posted 2 years ago -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberHi Lucylou,
You don't know how much your post means to me, I'm a very reserved person, not shy just reserved and I don't talk about things going on with my life to a lot of people especially about my problems with this (ex)boyfriend to my family and friends that care about me because they get tired very quickly and think its pathetic I havent let him go already. I understand them, and I feel pretty dumb myself but it is also annoying they think its a switch a could just pass and not care anymore.About the selfish immature culture around, I am completely with you I am not sure what is wrong with our generation, its like commitment + character + love is a menace to their freedom and happinnes, it makes me wonder a lot if I was born at the right era haha. It makes me pretty angry so to speak, if you are in love with me why are you so scared to end up with me? It just doesnt make sense, they have such a negative perspective.
I have heard my boyfriend say so many times, I want to travel I want to meet people I want to have a good time and Im like no sh*t me too!!! Its not like Im going to tie you down not to do those things, I actually want those to its not like we will be married tomorrow and our life is over... Why are you so scared of growing up and doing fun things together with the one you love by your side, I don't think I will ever get it.
I am just certain of one thing, they do need the time away from us, if they cannot compare what life is without you in it they will never value a loving girlfriend or wife to its fully extent. It might take them a month a year or 5 but at the latest their hormones will calm down eventually and they will start to think rationally, by the time they are 30 they realize how dumb they have been (hopefully waaaay years earlier if they want to be with us again)
Anyway I have seen so many people around our age getting married, I was starting to worry it was somehow my fault my relationship did not work out this way even though I dont want marriage yet I didnt want to breakup. Im glad you mention your friends having quarterlife crisis it makes me feel not so alone and that its not my fault to hear that. I did feel like I did chase him way too much but this time has given me for the second chance to learn from that and not ever chase again, it doesnt work it made me end up where I was at all over again.
Thank you for your post it means the world to me right now
Big hugs, keep Strong!!!
Posted 2 years ago # -
lucylou
offlineMemberHey KK,
I am so glad my post helped you
I also found that talking to my friends/family about it all they would listen but I could tell they were getting annoyed cause I wanted/couldn't help but talk about it all the time :/ So having this forum is amazing because everyone is going through the same thing or has already been through similar emotions.My brother in particular used to get really angry at me whenever I brought my ex up in conversation, he would be like "hes thrown you in the ditch why are you even thinking about him anymore!!!"
Its like believe me if it was that easy I wouldn't think about him! but of course my brother has never been dumped so he has no clue.
I know its hard as people outside of the situation cant see how much you think about it and obviously our exes were a massive part of our lives and our best friends too - it is so difficult to cut that out but yeah we understand it here so don't worry Yeah I felt like you at the beginning of NC too, I was like why is everyone being so weird and fucking off not giving a shit about their relationships.. I really couldn't understand but now I can see why. I don't think I cant really explain it but you will get there in time. When you are early NC it is difficult to imagine feeling any different to how you feel now.. when people say you might not want him back I would be adamant in my brain that I would never feel like that. So weird how time and space can change everything.
I know my ex used to say stuff like that too and I didn't understand why he couldn't do it all with me either? I remember having these exact thoughts and being so upset that he couldn't enjoy life with me, instead of going off without me. I think a lot of it is our age and funnily enough I am thinking of going travelling in a few months and thinking about going with my ex or with any romantic interest for that matter really doesn't appeal to me. I want to do it alone now. Which believe me is the complete opposite of how I used to be before the break up.
When I told my mum about travelling she was so shocked, I was such a scaredy cat and liked just doing stuff in a couple or at least having someone there to help me - she has watched me become more and more independent and fearless and its so weird! I never in a million years thought I would be like this but I love it. I am sure you will get to this stage KK - you are going to be so strong believe me
Yeah I think they will realise at some point but I do think the break ups are necessary, they need to experience life without us and we need to do the same - I am grateful for the break up now for all of the things I have realized and that have happened since. You will be grateful for it to Im sure of it
I saw my ex at a mutual friends and he was so shocked at how good I was doing and he didn't want to stop talking to me - I cut him off again afterwards because I didn't stick to the plan and spoke about feelings
like an idiot but it sticks in my mind that he was very confused because he had broken up with me but seemed to not really know why because I was back to the girl he fell in love with. That is an awesome feeling I am potentially going to see him tomorrow at another mutual friends party but I am going to stick to the plan and not talk about any feelings/personal life what so ever - Im sure that will drive him mad and it wont hurt to see him anymore because I know I'm doing well without him
I still love him and we get on so well but right now we cant be friends.If you look for it you will realise how many people our age are single/breaking up/all over the place and arent getting married so I wouldn't worry
Yeah chasing never works, we all learn from it haha nobody ever wants someone who is a crying mess its so unattractive, what they want is the person they fell in love with and someone who is really happy in their own skin.
Some advice for you is to definitely get The Power by Rhonda Byrne and also The Secret - the book or audiotape, it was so helpful to me and I think most forum users have used it to. The Law of Attraction is such an amazing thing to discover and helped me so so much through my difficult first months of NC so I really recommend those. There is a thread on here about LOA and its so interesting and helps understand better what those books talk about.
Hope this helps huuny bun
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberThis is the text I sent my EX yesterday
"I agree with the decision to break up, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would really appreciate if you didn't contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready."
I felt ridiculous sending this I really didnt want to but if Scott says it has to be done and it is what it takes, it has to be done :')
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
If you miss her "real bad", and you want to get your ex-girlfriend back, you need to take a look at this.Posted 2 years ago -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberlucylou said:
My brother in particular used to get really angry at me whenever I brought my ex up in conversation, he would be like "hes thrown you in the ditch why are you even thinking about him anymore!!!"
Its like believe me if it was that easy I wouldn't think about him! but of course my brother has never been dumped so he has no clue.hahaha thats funny, I have an uncle whos 29 and he has been dumped so many times and he would still say something like that to me. But the more he has gotten dumped the more he seems to know how to handle it and the quicker he recovers... It must be out of practice lol. This is my first boyfriend ever but I remember the first time we broke up I begged I cried I called I texted I pretended to be sick to get him to say nice things... duuuuuuuuuumb dumb
but this time around I think I handled it better, I started NC right away, last time it took me 2 weeks before even considering it. I guess practice makes perfect and I also realize that maybe the more relationships you have had in the past the more you realize that if the current one ends, life still goes on.... But yeah, its my first, I hope I learn all the lessons.
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberGot through day 2,
It was hard, I don't have that heartache I had the day of the breakup, but I have to improve my mood swings theyre out of control right now. I went to do some shopping just to get distracted and as I was buying stuff it kept coming to my mind what good would it do to look pretty anymore if he's not going to see me and then I snapped out of it WRONG WRONG WRONG. I'm doing this for me, a woman should look pretty for herself regardless of who what when.... Anyhow, whenever I start to feel sad I just try to think about how I am better off by myself right now and convince myself that it was a favor he did for me to take such a huge weight off my shoulders since I was constantly paying him so much attention I started to neglect myself and the things I would be doing otherwise if I was not in a relationship... It is so hard to keep that balance for me between my life as an individual and a life as a couple, I'm only 23 I guess it is something that is learnt with more time, I wish I didn't have to go through this to learn it though.
So yea... No Pain no gain !Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
If you miss him "real bad", and you want to get your ex-boyfriend back, you need to take a look at this.Posted 2 years ago -
MVC
offlineMemberKit kat,
I'm MVC, I haven't been very active recently, but after reading your break up story and your last post I feel so identified with you! Let me tell you something: your ex has a commitment issue and the situation you are creating ("waiting for him". "trying to talk to him...") is the perfect situation for him to perpetuate his inmature behaviour... he know that, whatever he does (hurts you, sees other girls, ...) he can always count on you as a "back up". The question is... do you want to be a "reserve", a second option? Think about this... please...
I'm glad you sent the NC message again. STick to it! He won't change, he won't. YOu can change. You aren't a second best, unless you want to be... I read the following somewhere... and I'm posting it here for you, to read, over and over again, until you recover your self esteem... I broke NC twice, and believe me, I though I was going to die... Now.. I see I was just unlucky to have met him! And lucky that he dumped me! And even more lucky to find this forum to make me realise that there are people, men and women, who don't there to be happy and they don't allow people around them being happy either! They are the most egoist people, the most cowards, the SHEEP Scott is talking about! WE are all here to help! Contact us if you need us! PM if you need.... and don't break NC ever, ever again! Stay strong Kit kat!!!
'1.Stop doing the same thing expecting different results. Do something DIFFERENT. Like shut-up!
2.Give yourself some peace. Any contact with him does not create peace or tranquility or better understanding; it only perpetuates distress and confusion. It never solves anything for you.
3. You are not the gift that keeps on giving. So Just Stop! You are pouring yourself into a black hole.
4. Contacting him will only remind you of how unimportant you are to him. Last thing you need right now is someone showing you how much you don't matter. Don't give it the space.
5.Have some self-respect. You are worth more than text messaging or emailing – that’s all he’s got for you, and it’s no use to you.
6.You wouldn’t put up with his crap arrangement from anyone else – what reasons do you think you have to put up with it from him?
7.He does not want what you have offered him. He has turned you down, time and time and time and time again. Why are you still offering him anything at all?
8.You cannot change him; you cannot get through to him. The only thing you can change is your own behavior. So change it.
9.He is not going to care about you. You need to care about you. Be your own best friend. Do what you know is good FOR YOU.
10.Confusion, hurt, dishonesty, and disappointment are not kindly, well-intentioned gentlemen callers. Close the door.
11.Give him a new and final experience of you. Your silence.
12.Remember: He will speak to you if that is what you want; but only under the terms of his own self-serving agenda, only if he sets the topics and you abide by his unreasonable boundaries – that’s his deal, you can have it or you can fuck off. Don’t go along with it any more. Choose fuck off. Choose you.
13.Remember: you are not in the same relationship. He is not in this with you. You are riding solo to Miseryville via Miseryville. Get off the horse.
14.He is neither emotionally nor physically available for you. He is somewhere else, on some other planet. So long as you remain emotionally and physically available for him you are burying and abandoning yourself in a loveless tomb – all by yourself. Why would you do that?'"Sometimes our power resides not in what we do, but in what we don't do" (Paulo Coehlo)Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberMVC thank you.. Right now im in denial mode, so even when I know I havent been treated right even though I know there are plenty of guys who would kill to treat me right I am still there trying to make excuses for him in my mind... He said to please just give him 2 weeks to sort himself at least, but I just shut it with the NC text... Ill get better I know I just need time to internalize how shallow and immature his reasons to get a break are...
On the other side of things next weekend Im going to hang out with an old friend I used to have a crush on right before I met the bf... He also just brokeup with his gf haha go figure, I dont like him that way any more but he's a pretty cool guy so at least it will be good to get my attention away from the ex for a brief moment of my life
My emotions have been all over the place... sometimes I feel ok and in my fuck him i dont care mode, then sometimes I feel sad this is happening, then like I want to just die....THEN all of a sudden Im happy again and all talkative with people and just normal when I was in tears a few moments ago..... Talk about bipolar
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
Posted 2 years ago -
lucylou
offlineMemberHey KitKat,
sorry to hear you broke NC
Please learn from this and never do it again because it wont have the same impact the more you have to send that message. Whenever I thought about breaking it I just thought no he will not win, I will do this, also if you ever want him back this is the only way that will happen, not by calling or talking to him and getting into arguments.Its totally normal to go so up and down with your emotions believe me, everyone here has been there. I definitely have, it was horrendous and so difficult, my mind wouldnt stop racing and I couldnt shut him out of my brain. It does get much better the further into NC you go.
Your ex said give him 2 weeks because he wants space, and is saying a short amoutnt of time so that you will leave him alone. Please dont give him the pleasure of him being mean to you by breaking this at all.
Thats good you are going to see your old crush next weekend that should help distract you a bit,make loads of plans, book up all of your time and get busy with fun people - I did that and it helped ALOT!
Stay strong sweetie, you are better than this guy and I promise things get so much easier!! big hugs
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberThank you for the support Lucy =)
Today wasn't bad, I went to my Uni, studied before a test with a couple of friends, took test did well, for some reason my friends have been approaching me more and people in general, something like that happened yesterday too at work... It's weird and hard to explain, it is as if I become more open to people when I'm 'single' and people in general sense this and approach me wether its a friend I havent talked to in some time or a complete stranger. I noticed this during my last breakup too... I haven't told anyone anything whats going on and it feels like since I'm not with the ex and making plans with him and doing everything with him the world opens up to me, or rather I open up... This just worried me a little, I know I become so consumed when I'm a girlfriend I dont want to make that mistake again on my next relationship, but how can I change this about myself? I guess it has to be a conscious effort.
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberOh this is not very relevant but whatever, I dyed my hair black (which is my natural color) I wish ex could see me at least from a far
because I have had it on a light brown shade for so many years I got tired of it and I look awesome with my black hair =D dont know why I kept going with the brown and blondish highlights for so long... The difference is immense =D 
love it
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
If you're considering reconnecting with your ex, after NC. You should take a look at this system. It never hurts to learn more about relationships, how they work, and how to maintain them.Posted 2 years ago -
lucylou
offlineMemberIm glad to hear your day was ok, thats good you have uni to focus on. Use this as a big motivation to achieve and do really well at uni
Yes I think people pick up on the vibes that you arent so closed off anymore, I really have noticed vibes that I give off and other people since this break up and its so strange but I love being able to notice things that I wouldnt have even paid attention to before.
This is kind of like Law of Attraction too so make sure you read up on it, its amazing!
When I was with my ex I was in my own little bubble, focussing on what me & him were doing but I shoudnt have been like that. Since my break up Ive reconnected with so many old friends and made lots of new ones and I love it
Dont worry KK as you go through this process you will grow and evove to that you won't be like that again, I was exactly like that too but even the fact that youve realised this is great Your hair sounds awesome yay! After a break up its so good to make changes, glad you are loving your hair, natural hair colours always suit us way more than any other colour I usually find
Hope you are doing well sweetie
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberThank you thank you you guys are awesome =) <3 much love. Ok I got through today without messing up!!! It was hard, but =) good.
If things do not happen through the way it is supposed to be and the way I deserve to be treated then I dont care if I don't get him back ... I will win this time!!! I wont make the same mistake again. This time its my way or the highway. 
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberOk yesterday was awesome, went out with my friends, today I was kind of going insane with NC.. I just joined a dating site to get myself distracted I almost cried when I did dating someone else is the last thing I want right now but then I thought ok I dont have to go to any dates, I can just chat or text some guys (like he is probably doing with other girls uuuugh it hurts) to keep my sanity and keep myself from breaking NC... What do you guys think??? I feel so guilty I dont know why.
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
Hey, I read about this on one of those relationship sites, the other day. It said something like, if you are ready, and you want your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend to come crawling back to you on their knees (no matter why you broke up and even if they’re dating somebody else now) you need to Watch This Video. I did, I thought it was really interesting.Posted 2 years ago -
lingtszlovemyself
offlineMemberKitkat I know how you feel about feeling guilty. I was the same as you too. It's been almost 5 months since our break up and I haven't had another relationship yet nor I want one right now. You know one time I got a notice that he checked my profile out on a dating site months after our break up! I felt so complicated and embarrassed, almost as if I was caught in the act/ he found me cheating. Also, I was so angry that he joined that site to meet new girls. Maybe part of us still cannot accept the fact that we are no longer together and both of us have the rights to meet new people.
After all I did make some friends from those dating sites and other places. It's always nice to talk to new people. They give you insights that I've never thought of. Some boys shared with me how they can be attracted and when should girls do to maintain a relationship. I found that very helpful to see from boys' perspective and I found that some theories of the relationship books are actually true! Those friends I met during this period, may not be my Mr. Right. But they do serve the purpose of distraction and give me chances to practise how to treat myself right. Never settle for less. I'm sure it is so much needed if we want to build a healthy relationship in the future, no matter with our ex, or some other guys.
I hope you will stay strong because as time goes by, the bad days will come up and we need a lot of will power to fight against it!
Keep it up warrior!
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberEx texted me... He said
" Im sorry, i cant be with you right now, I love you and miss you but it is not right, you are still my beautiful and most favorite person in the whole world but Im just a dumbass right now and I dont deserve you. I know I will regret this later. But I cant be in a relationship with anyone right now, I don't want to cheat on you. I am sorry, one day I know I will realize what a terrible mistake I made and it will be me asking for you back. Im so stupid, I know.. Im sorry "WTFFFFFF... Why is he such a dickhead contradiction, he cant control his penis what the hell *Sorry I know I shouldnt be venting but Im so angry and hurt at the same time*... I cant even, what a waste of my life this 3 years all down the drain... its ridiculous some men are unbelievable
Posted 2 years ago # -
lingtszlovemyself
offlineMemberHonestly, I think he's saying this to mess with your mind. Hinting that he might want you back in the future so you'd better wait for him...I simply will want to vomit if I see a message like this
Listen to Beyonce's "If I were a boy" - my favourite lines:
"It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say it's just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong""You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
'Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you had got destroyedBut you’re just a boy"
There are plenty of good guys out there waiting to love good girls like us...so
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
I was lurking in another forum the other night, and this woman was talking about Valentines day, and how her man never does anything "special" for her, anymore. She was seriously doubting if he loved her anymore, and was asking for advice on how to tell if a guy still loves you. This one woman answered her, and told her about this video she watched. It explained the best way to discover if your man still loves you, without him even realizing that you're asking. I checked it out, myself, it's pretty cool.I think this might be the best way to tell if he still loves you.Posted 2 years ago -
lucylou
offlineMemberHey KK,
Can't believe he sent that, hes basically saying, I want you to sit and wait for me while I have my freedom and go get with other girls and make sure I definitely want yu.
He thinks you will be there waiting for him after hes done with his little single phase, so prove him wrong with NC and by turning into an amazing strong warrior. The fact that he sent you this is really quite manipulative I hope you can see through all of the bullshit here.
If he genuinely didnt want to see you hurt he wouldnt send a message like this, he wouldnt contact you until he actually knew for sure he wanted you back, or just not contact you at all and respect your NC request.
When I was early NC my ex would send me things sayign wish you were here and a poem about how amazing this woman was, but he still didnt want me back he just wanted to keep me sweet and keep me waiting there for him.
Kepp strong KK no matter what!!
Posted 2 years ago # -
Hopeful
offlineMemberHi KK,
I hope you did not text him back! It sounds a little bit like he has "grass is greener syndrome." He will eventually see it's not. And,
If you keep NC, he will come back. But, right now, he feels like he can have you whenever he wants you. Prove to him he can't. Have your gone on any dates? (Sorry, I didn't read your whole diary). Even if you don't feel like it, or aren't ready, it does help to remind you that you are desirable by other men and that you don't need to sit on the back burner! I was in this exact situation right outside of college. I actually received a text from my ex that was almost word for word what your text said. I decided right then and there that I was getting a life and moving on. I met another guy, made new friends, reconnected with old friends, and was having a blast. And then, out of nowhere, he was back. A text here. A phone call there. (All ignored). Next thing I knew, he was at my doorstep, begging for another chance. But, I had to move on! Just be strong. And, be stubborn!Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberThank you guys so much for your thoughts, it keeps me sane. I have been so tempted to reply and feeling so terrible terrible I just resent the NC meesage so that it makes me stick to the plan. I have to restart. I feel bad right now about what he said.
Thanks !!!
Posted 2 years ago # -
Kick-Loves-Ass
Posted 2 years ago -
lucylou
offlineMemberYou are showing how strong you are by resending the NC message KK you are doing so well thats amazing that you did that when you felt tempted to reply.
He wants you to reply remember that and you cannot give him what he wants and stay there waiting around for him like he wants.
He wants you to reply and reassure him you arent going anywhere, which is totally not happening. The fact that you don't reply will speak volumes and he will worry that he is going to lose you.
I remember my ex sending things that really tugged at my heart and found it so upsetting but I was so glad I stayed strong as I felt much better for it You are doing so well KK, keep it up
Posted 2 years ago # -
Hopeful
offlineMemberKK- just stay strong. In the end, it will feel so good! And, you will come out a better and even stronger person . This pain is only short term. Think long term! And, in the meantime, keep busy! And, maybe try dating a few other guys. You may meet someone that treats you so well, and wants to be with you 100%. And, that's a game changed.
Posted 2 years ago # -
lingtszlovemyself
offlineMemberKitKat2006 said:
He texted me asking me where I bought a cellphone case i gave him cuz he wanted a new one...
I did not answer ofcourse
He is such a
he can get a new phone case anywhere...why get it from where you get the old one? Just making excuse to manipulate you...same as my ex...asking me questions which he can sort out by himself...... 
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberhe wants another one exactly like the one I gave him cuz its already wearing off.. Ive told him a thousand times before I got it on ebay.. He is forgetful but anyhow Im sure it is just an excuse to say something
he called me by my nickname too like nothing has happened he doesn't think I will be able to keep the NC, but he's screwed because this aint gonna be like our breakup a year ago... This time its for real, either he grows up or he's out.
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberI came across this online and I wanted to share it with you guys =)
I wanted to share it so bad with my exboyfriend but then remembered I couldn't *sigh* Here it is:In the late 80s, Lieserl, the daughter of the celebrated genius, donated 1,400 letters written by Einstein at the Hebrew University, with orders not to publish your content until two decades after his death.
This is one of them ... a Lieserl Einstein.
"When I proposed the theory of relativity, very few understood me, and what I will reveal to you now transmit to mankind also collide with misunderstanding and prejudice in the world.
I ask you though, that you guard all the time necessary, years, decades, until society has advanced enough to accept what I explain below.
There is an extremely powerful force for that so far science has not found a formal explanation. It is a force that includes and governs all the others, and is even behind any phenomenon operating in the universe and has not yet been identified by us. This universal force is LOVE.
When scientists were looking for a unified theory of the universe forgot the most invisible and powerful forces.
Love is Light illuminates because who gives and receives. Love is serious, because it makes some people feel attracted to others. Love is power, because it multiplies the best we have, and let humanity not extinguished in their blind selfishness. Love reveals and reveals. For love is live and die. Love is God and God is Love.
This force explains everything and gives meaning to life uppercase. This is the variable that we have ignored for too long, maybe because we are afraid to love because it is the only power in the universe that man has not learned to drive at will.
To give visibility to love, I made a simple replacement on my most famous equation. If instead of E = mc2 accept that energy to heal the world can be obtained through love multiplied by the speed of light squared, come to the conclusion that love is the most powerful force there, because it has limits.
After the failure of humanity in the use and control of the other forces of the universe that have turned against us, it is imperative that we nurture another kind of energy. If we want our species to survive, if we are to find meaning in life, if we want to save the world and every sentient being that inhabits it, love is the only and the last answer.
Perhaps we are not yet ready to make a bomb of love, powerful enough to destroy all artifact hate, selfishness and greed plaguing the planet. However, each individual carries within it a small but powerful generator of love whose energy waiting to be released.
When we learn to give and receive this universal energy, Lieserl dear, see that love conquers all, transcends everything and can do everything, because love is the quintessence of life.
I deeply regret not having been able to express what my heart is home, which has quietly beat for you all my life. Maybe it's too late to apologize, but as time is relative, I need to say I love you and thanks to you I've come to the last answer ".
Your father: Albert Einstein. "
Posted 2 years ago # -
KitKat2006
offlineMemberhi everyone =) I hope all is well... i have had a recent epiphany like around a week or so ago, I dont know if it is permanent or not since it is so recent... But I realized I don't want this guy back. I realized during this time that he does not truly love me that he is irresponsible not just with his relationships but in many other areas of his life in general and I dont want someone like that anyway... I have been dating someone else and even though I don't know if it will lead to something at a higher level it has made me realize that there are better people out there. So that's where I am right now, if my ex were to ask me back today I am 100% percent sure I would say NO at the current state of things. A few weeks ago I was too dumb and caught up to realize how unhappy I was in this relationship.
Hope all is well!!! =)
Best xoxoxoxoxPosted 2 years ago #
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