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Braxton NC Diary
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I HATE SPAM! Read Our Privacy PolicyPosted 4 months ago Braxton
offlineMemberHi,
I agree with you about the decision to break up, I really believe it was the best thing for both of us. I have some big decisions to make and I need some time to think them over. I would really appreciate it if you didn’t contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready.
*Note – If you share custody of children you can alter the part: “I would really appreciate it if you didn’t contact me during this time. I will be in touch when I am ready.” to read: “I would really appreciate it if you didn’t contact me during this time, unless it is about our child/children. I will be in touch when I am ready.”
Posted 4 months ago #-
samxarra
offlineMemberBraxton, welcome to the forum!
I have read your diary and whoa....dude, you have to keep it together. Keep it cool, and do not break NC! At all cost.
It will be an emotional journey, painful, hard but hell, it will make us realize stuff.
For a start, read the free plan and stick to it. If you need to cry, go cry. If you need to shout, do it. Just don't contact her or reply to any of her craziness.
Within the next two or three days, come up with a plan on how to re-tweak your life and stick your guns through it.
I'm sorry we are all here, but we are here for one reason. To take our life back.
Rock on!
Keep calm and carry on.Posted 4 months ago # -
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Posted 4 months ago shapingup
offlineInactivehey braxton, i read your breakup story and... dude, whoa. i agree with sam, you MUST keep it together and maintain NC! i recently began putting together a "beginner" detox plan to break away from the power i've given my ex over me... i would encourage this for you as well.
here's an example of some of the things i've already committed to:
My BEGINNER Detox Plan
1. Yoga 2x p/wk and increase my WATER intake. I’ve become stagnant in my health goals. No more putting it off!
2. Read “The Secret” and “The Power” to begin the study of getting my life back and finding my positive attitude. I need balance!
3.Spend time with friends, 2x p/wk… no excuses! Only POSITIVE friends!i imagine that if you begin to busy yourself, follow the free plan and set small goals to accomplish you will begin to feel better. you've been on a hella rollercoaster ride, man... the ones that make you wanna barf... find your sure footing and then take off running!
welcome to the forum, i'm new too and have had some similar craziness with my ex... let's do this together:)
Posted 4 months ago #-
Braxton
offlineMemberThanks Shapingup. Today I guess would technically be day 1 of no contact since I sent the letter yesterday, we havent talked in 4 days. It is tough, but just writing out the break up story really helped me get a grip on what was going on. She is really bad for me, I still feel like I wish she would call. It hurts to think about her with the other guy. But I know it won't work. So my plan is to keep up NC until I don't want her anymore. I like your plan Shaping up. I have already started eating better, I am now staying away from alchol because it just hurts worse when I drink and I have been going to the gym daily for two weeks. Keeping busy is really the only way to go.
Thanks for the support
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberSo day 2 NC
Not sure how I was feeling today. Took my mom in for surgery and the nurse got my number to set me up with her niece. Felt pretty good, but I know I'm not ready to date yet. Pretty strong no real yearing to contact, but still a heavy feeling in my chest. I did get a text from her today saying "Hey, was wondering about a few things, dog stuff and etc so call me when you get a chance please" part of me wants to call but a bigger part wants to tell her to STFU. So I'm just gonna keep on NC.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton said:
I did get a text from her today saying "Hey, was wondering about a few things, dog stuff and etc so call me when you get a chance please" part of me wants to call but a bigger part wants to tell her to STFU. So I'm just gonna keep on NC.If you feel uncomfortable talking to her, use email or text to take care of any shared business.
It is funny how right after you send the NC message she needs to talk to you.
Is someone testing the waters?
Get a forum buddy, and ask for advice before doing anything you are not sure about, that is why our forum is here.
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
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Posted 4 months ago -
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, you can absolutely keep walking away from your dead relationship. You can do this. You have to do this for yourself right now. It helped me to envision my future self thanking my present self for sticking to strict NC and walking away from something that wasn't going to work. Even though she is the one who moved out, make no mistake that you are walking away from her. The experience is like kicking an addiction and you can resist your cravings for her. I've read that tumultuous relationships can be more addictive than stable relationships, even though that seems backwards. You are doing the right thing to have no contact with her and you need to protect that fiercely. You will need to protect it fiercely now and in future years, from what I can see from your story. You need to walk away for the long haul.You can do it for yourself and for your family, and for any kids you hope to have in the future.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberHey everyone, SW, lunapearl, willsucceed thanks for the encouragement. It is really surprising how liberating it feels to send the NC letter. I guess it is having some control again. Control over my own life. I really don't want to lose it, so thank everyone that has taken an interest and been supportive. With that said I am starting to second guess my NC today. What will happen if I don't get back to her, will I lose her forever? That's what's going through my heart. But my head says she isn't even worth it, so for now I'm writing here in my diary instead of contacting her
Posted 4 months ago # -
lunapearl
offlineMemberthen write it here, write in your personal journal too so you still keep it private,
i myself had been in a 6 years relationship, when i dont talk or meet or hear my ex's voice, i hurt inside, like my heart is tearing apart, it was like that in the first weeks, now i am in my 4th week, i dont feel hurt, i just feel empty, like he is just a dream, i feel that i have been living in a dream, i just dont wanna live in a dream of me and him so i gotta move on, well that's my pain healing, but in time i am not gonna feel empty anymore because i will fill my heart with happyness!tomorrow is another day!stay strong brax!
Posted 4 months ago # -
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Posted 4 months ago goodlucksuccess
offlineMemberHey Braxton
Just finished reading your Breakup story.Its great that you finally decided to come out of the mess and have began to have a control over your life.Do whatever makes you feel happy and alive..Common..That's what we all are here for.Right??
To get Our Life Back.
Do things which you were once interested in earlier ,but were ignored somehow just because you were busy to fulfill someone else's interest!Is it making sense? Hope so..
Start paying attention to yourself and the world will be yours.
Take Care.
Posted 4 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, definitely build your support system. Forum buddies , personal journal, posting here, trusted friends who share your commitment to walk away. I have found exercise to be a great help in getting through the toughest times. Stand firm. You need to be stronger now than you ever have before. You have that strength. Draw on it now. Remember that when the emotions and cravings are running high that you won't feel like that always. It will get better and I can promise you that you will thank yourself for your dignity and very quality of life as you evolve. You can do this.
Will you be moving to another job site soon? What are you doing just for yourself to help you get through this and evolve? We are interested. Read old NC diaries like sugar-rabbit, pinkchinchilla, and MelanieStryder and others. Keep active on the forum, both your own NC diary and others. We really want you to succeed in getting your life back. We understand first hand the emotional turmoil and torment you are experiencing and can see from your breakup story that you are a strong, family oriented man. You need to get your life back and have the kind of relationship that will give you lasting fulfillment and happiness with someone who respects, admires and cherishes you.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberOk so I have felt strong until right now. She text me yesterday about some garbage then again tonight at 11:30.
1). Hey?
2) Really?
3) Whatever act like you haven't gotten these texts that's cool
WTF I know I can't but I want to answer so bad. What does she want? Is she sorry? Does she think she made a mistake? Why does a few text messages have the ability to get my heart racing like this and make me so unsure of myself?
Posted 4 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, any contact in any form is upsetting and sends our minds in overdrive. It is like a drug addict seeing/smelling/hearing their drug and having to resist it. How can you finish any and all business with her and block her texts, calls, and emails? You need to do this just like an addict needs to be 100% removed from any and all reminders of the drug. I know from personal experience the racing heart and system overdrive of receIving emails from him. It helped me tremendously to set my email to filter his messages out and I thank my lucky stars (i.e. Scott, forum members, friends, and myself) that I didn't see certain emails until after the divorce and it would have been better to not see them at all. Why? Because they are written by someone who wants his cake and eat it too. He wanted the comfort of friendship with me and our longstanding relationship at the same time he is fucking and vacationing with her. He wants me and her at the same time. Well I am most definitely not being someone's comfortable old shoe.
The fastest way for her new 'relationship' to fail is for you to remove yourself entirely from her world. Why? Because he needs to meet all of her needs. Let that motivate you right now. What you gain is infinitely more important: space you need to evolve and gain strength in yourself. Even though your emotions are in overdrive and turmoil, remember that your actions are most important. Stay strong and don't react to her. There is a page in pinkchinchilla's NC diary that has some great quotes about how you are changing how you respond to her away from the failed ways you responded in the relationship. Read a lot of NC diaries to see how others have progressed through this. You may find 'Love Must Be Tough' helpful to read and 'The Power' helpful to read.
Posted 4 months ago # -
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Posted 4 months ago Braxton
offlineMemberHey everyone. Happy new year and thanks for all the positive support. I have to say that without your support I would not have made it through the holidays as successfully. Day 5(midnight before NYE)received the following
Her: Braxton?
Her: Really Braxton
Her: ok pretend your not getting any of my messages ... That's cool
Her: really (silly name she would call me)I didnt respond
Today
Thought about her a lot last night
Text today
Her: hello Braxton. I'm not sure why you won't talk to me but we need to set a date for you to get the dog back, and my stuff. I just want this over ya know. Don't make me contact your mother again
So what is she doing. Why cant she either leave me alone or say she wants to get back together. Why keep this constant contact up every couple days if she just wants this to be over? Now we have already discussed these thing multiple times. I have mailed her things to her but she prob hasn't gotten them due to the holidays. And the dog situation she knows that as soon as I get a place to accept him I will take him and she knows it has only been 7 days since we last talked about it. So what is she doing? I mean supposedly a week after breaking up she was dating this guy that was her best friend before and he is so amazing and they are so in love and she has always been so in live with him or that's what she told me anyways. So why stay in such close contact with me. For the first three weeks we talked all day everyday until I went NC for my own good. And now she is still trying stuff like this at the most every 2-3 days.....
Posted 4 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, it is amazing how selfish they can be in wanting their cake and eat it too. Glad you are keeping NC and your actions are speaking volumes of self-dignity and self-control. If she wants to be with him, then let him meet all her needs (good luck to him with that).
Given your breakup story, you might look around for a temporary place for your dog until you can take him/her just in case she pushes that really hard. Can you pay a friend to keep the dog? If so, you don't have to explain any of that to her--just have the friend go pick up the dog. She doesn't need to know any details of your life and your arrangements and if you do use this strategy, make sure the friend is very clear on this.
You're doing good with keeping NC and mailing her stuff to her. Try your best to get the dog situation finalized as soon as possible and then block her texts on the phone if you can.
You're doing good. You can do this and not let this selfish person string you along as a back-up plan.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberToday went well and still is despite my ex's efforts to ruin everything. I have been keeping strict no contact no matter what she would say or do. However, today I broke NC but I really had no choice. Since I was ignoring her she began to text my family members. Telling them to tell me to send her stuff back and I needed to get my dog blah blah and that i was an asshole. All stuff we discussed 9 days ago. So I simply responded ...your stuff is in the mail, I'll contact you when I am able to get the dog. Then promptly sent the NC email again just like it reads at the beginning of this diary. She tried to call me 6 times in a row following that which I did not answer and I will keep NC up. So is this breaking the rule? What is she thinking? Would anyone have handled this differently?
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton said:
So is this breaking the rule?Nope, you handled it well.
You have to handle your unfinished business, but you don't have to make small talk, or answer any personal questions about the break up, or the NC message.
Great Job Braxton!
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
Learn How to Create The Destiny of Your Choice
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Posted 4 months ago -
Braxton
offlineMemberStill staying strong as I come up on two weeks. I have returned her text twice with very short to the point messages regarding some unfinished business. However she is becoming increasingly unstable. Two days ago she called me 12 times and texted me and my family members trying to get in touch about her stuff, the phone and the dog. I didnt respond but yesterday did have AT&T send the paperwork to her email to take over the line. When she got it she sent a nice thank you text and asked me about her stuff and the dog again. I responded by telling her that I want the dog but it will be a week or two until I can take him. So last night I get 10 more missed calls from her and my family members got a bunch of texts and calls. She kept asking where I was living so she could drop off the dog. She asked was something weird going on. But then said she didn't care what I was doing and didn't want any info. After which she told my cousin who didn't give her any info that she was a fake friend and not to bother texting her anymore and not to worry because she wouldn't be talking to her. So I don't know what her problem is. But I don't want to contact her. I am getting her stuff together this weekend and looking for a place for the dog. She knows all this but acts like she has no idea what's going on. I just don't get it I can't do all this overnight
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton said:
It's really hard to know what to doWhy?
You have a plan to follow, it doesn't get any easy than that.
Now, if you weren't a member of our forum (with a free plan and support system) I could understand that statement.
You know what to do, so just keep doing it, and stop filling your head with negative thoughts like that...why?
After a while you will convince yourself that you "really" don't know what to do.
Mindset is everything.
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
Learn How to Create The Destiny of Your Choice
FREE Step-by-Step BREAK UP SURVIVAL PLANPosted 4 months ago # -
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Posted 4 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, I'm glad you're taking the dog because she sounds unstable in both your breakup story and your posts here. Just so you are prepared in case she brings the dog to you and refuses to care for him/her anymore, I would make sure you have a boarding situation at a dog kennel ready just in case. Fortunately at this time of year they are usually not full, so it shouldn't be a problem finding a spot. You may have already boarded your dog, but if not, you need your latest record of shots from your vet and they usually require "kennel cough" vaccine as well. So, make sure you have a recent copy of your records, and if your dog has not been vaccinated for kennel cough, be prepared to do that and then take your dog to the kennel for boarding until you get the situation figured out for boarding him/her until you get a place that allows dogs. If you board your dog with a vet, they can do any required vaccinations there while the dog is being boarded.
All her antics are to get you to respond to her in a way that she is used to so that she feels more secure and knows you are there as a backup plan.
Great job on not being predictable and for not being a backup plan!
Posted 4 months ago #-
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, How are you doing? If you read some old NC diaries, I've mentioned PinkChinchilla, MelanieStryder, and sugar_rabbit are good ones. I would add that Jaysun's forum is also interesting to read. I know I found and still find it helpful to read some of the longer forums to see how people's thoughts and perspectives change as they develop and evolve.
Here's a memorable SW quote from an old NC diary.
This is what I consider getting your life back, dropping the baggage from the old failed relationship, and burying it forever...then you have kicked loves ass.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberI'm doing better than the last time I posted. I still sticking strong to NC, even though I have had some weak moments I also have found that my will power is much stronger than I ever realized. She continues to contact me if not daily at least every other day. She will text then call. One day she called 10 times in a row. She goes from being angry with me to being nice. She has also been contacting my family when she can't get in touch with me. So I think she must be a little upset which I would be lying if I said didn't bother me but it's not my job to comfort her anymore.
Even though I am trying to put myself in the mindset that I am doing NC strictly for myself I would be lying if I there wasn't a little hope for reconciliation still. But NC has been an excellent opportunity to step back. I am realizing what I need to fix about myself and more importantly I am becoming more in tune with what I need as a person to be happy. Like I said earlier I hold on to hope with her still, even though you all prob think that's insane. But the feelings just don't go away. But I find myself obsessing less over what she is doing and thinking of her with someone else doesn't hurt as much. The thing that has surprised me the most is not just how surprised I was at the strength I had inside me to keep up NC but at the odd feeling I get when she does try to contact me. It is hard to describe but I see her message or number pop up and I do want to answer but there is another, stronger feeling that is stopping me. Not sure if it's me moving on, if I'm scared to answer or maybe I am gaining self respect and just know I need to protect myself from someone that will most likely hurt me
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Posted 4 months ago willsucceed
offlineMemberLike I said earlier I hold on to hope with her still, even though you all prob think that's insane. But the feelings just don't go away.
Braxton, we can relate to this from our own experiences. Because feelings don't just go away--how I wish they could--we are all trying to structure our lives to move forward as steadily and fully as we can. That's what I see NC and developing ourselves does as we get our life back. The emotions will be there and get better with time, but having the emotions doesn't change the reality of our situations. Our emotions can prompt some unhelpful behaviors from us, like being receptive and controlled by the crumbs that our ex's throw us.
So we change our behaviors to live as if we have the emotions of a healed and healthy person.
Otherwise we stay in limbo, like a fish on the line. Instead we develop new talents and skills. What a difference! I hadn't actually realized the drastic difference between these two alternatives until writing this.
Posted 4 months ago #-
Braxton said:
Like I said earlier I hold on to hope with her still, even though you all prob think that's insane.There is nothing insane about having hope, that is what makes people tick.
If we didn't have hope we wouldn't get out of bed in the morning, we would just lie there waiting to die, and we would...eventually.
But you are focusing your hope in the wrong place.
Focus your hope on yourself and your happiness, not on getting your ex back.
You equate getting your ex back with happiness because of the good memories you keep playing over in your head.
But, what about the bad memories?
People change, it is guaranteed.
Everything happens for a good reason...that is the truth, whether we choose to believe it or not.
But that is the difference between the people who suffer for years, and the people who evolve, move on, and become happier than they were before the break up.
They have a positive perception of their situation, they help themselves accept what happened, let it go, and grow.
Is the glass half full or half empty?
Is your life worse off, or better because of this break up?
Instead of getting high off the past good times that are gone for good.
Focus on evolving past your old relationship (life) and reinvent yourself.
This the healthy way to deal with disappointment, and it will enhance your life as well.
Take it from someone who has had to tell himself this same exact thing a lot over the last decade.
Here is a little tid-bit from my life as an internet marketer.
I spent the last 7 months and $1062.00 learning that a certain software product doesn't work...it is a scam.
Why did it take me so long to figure this out?
Because I wanted so bad to believe what all the gurus were saying, and I also didn't want to believe that I wasted so much time and money.
What was the result?
I kept on wasting time and money...it is fucking hilarious.
Last night a switch flipped in my head and I saw "the light".
I finally learned my lesson, and a basic truth that will change my business forever.
No matter how much you want to, you can't change the facts or the truth.
Stop ignoring your inner instincts (common sense), and wake the fuck up.
I realized why I hesitated for so long to even try using this bullshit software, deep inside I didn't think it would work.
But, then I convinced myself that I was just "scared to take a chance", and if I didn't my business would suffer.
I had to listen to what a lot of the top marketers were saying...they lied.
I saw the proof myself...7 months work, and over $1000 (BTW that is way more than I make a month doing this).
Remember how I said everything happens for a reason, a good reason?
If I didn't go down this road, my eyes would not have finally opened up...now I can see, see the bullshit, and the fucking lies.
I also learned A LOT about SEO by analyzing my results with this software, and how it worked and didn't work.
I didn't "waste" 7 months, and $1000...I went to school, and I graduated with honors.
I have evolved, and my business will too.
This is the kind of attitude (outlook) you need to have to get your life back after your breakup.
Don't focus on the lost money (love), time, and the heartbreak of disappointment (breakup), look at how far you have come, and what you have learned, this is the key.
Your breakup was not the end, it was the beginning of the next phase of your life.
Are you going to pay attention and make it better than the last phase, or will you repeat the same mistakes over again hoping for a different result?
The second part of that statement is a definition for insanity...doing the same thing over and over, and hoping for different results.
You have to change what you're doing to get better results, the results you want and deserve.
Let go of the past, and pay attention to this new path life has put you on since the break up.
The future can be brighter, the same, or worse...it all depends on what you do today...right now.
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
Learn How to Create The Destiny of Your Choice
FREE Step-by-Step BREAK UP SURVIVAL PLANPosted 4 months ago # -
LCommander
offlineMemberHi Braxton, I know Im a bit late but I recently joined and I have just read your story. YOU DESERVE BETTER! It really made me tear up when she could easily destroy things of sentimental value and take you for granted. Its going to be hard but you just need to get away from this person, heal, and find that many more women who would be MUCH more appreciative for all the things you would do for them than your ex and return that love to you. I wish you the best of luck and take care knowing we're all in this together =)
P.S. after reading your story, it gives me a new perspective on mine and how much more humbled I am now. Thank you for sharing.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberQuick post. I broke NC like everyone here said not too. Did it anyways. Dumb dumb. Don't do this. I saw things in what she was saying/doing made me think she wanted to try again. Then I found out I was wrong and I found out how happy she is. Sent NC letter again
DAY 1
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Posted 4 months ago -
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, many others have broken NC before and it seems that it actually makes staying in NC and walking away a much firmer decision. I'm guessing that contact shows how they are needing assurance of our feelings as a cruel boost and confidence builder for them. We see how all their communications to us are for the purpose of having us bolster them. It's the complete flip of what it appears to be.
Keep letting us know how it's going. What has happened about the dog?
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton said:
Sent NC letter againGreat Job Braxton!
Learn from your mistakes, that's why we make them, it is a learning process.
Stay Strong and Positive!
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." ~ Henry David Thoreau ~
Learn How to Create The Destiny of Your Choice
FREE Step-by-Step BREAK UP SURVIVAL PLANPosted 4 months ago # -
Tirofbs
offlineMemberBraxton said:
Thanks Shapingup. Today I guess would technically be day 1 of no contact since I sent the letter yesterday, we havent talked in 4 days. It is tough, but just writing out the break up story really helped me get a grip on what was going on. She is really bad for me, I still feel like I wish she would call. It hurts to think about her with the other guy. But I know it won't work. So my plan is to keep up NC until I don't want her anymore. I like your plan Shaping up. I have already started eating better, I am now staying away from alchol because it just hurts worse when I drink and I have been going to the gym daily for two weeks. Keeping busy is really the only way to go.Thanks for the support
I feel the same way, and the sad feeling of them not contacting you. I started thinking, and came to the conclusion that when they don't contact you it's a way of looking at the situation for what it is. They don't care, they never cared!!!! Why should you?? This is about us, like SW has been saying all along. We need to care about ourselves, and not what they care about. Love yourself before loving others. I am proud of you and I want you to know that you're not alone. We are all here for you!!! Keep going and don't look back
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Posted 4 months ago Braxton
offlineMemberDay 2 NC the second time around is light years better than the first time around. The best part of this forum is that at each step I take I come back here to read all of your comments. Each time they all have a different meaning. Sort of how a break up song hurts much more when your in a break up then when your not. But your comments provide me with renewed strength and a different perspective on the situation each time. First I was looking for reasons, then I was looking for excuses now I am ki d of mad at her for screwing with me and I plan to be looking to make peace with it and move on completely next.
Posted 4 months ago #-
Braxton
offlineMemberThe last few days have defenatley been different. I slowly working towards my goal of being done with her, not thinking about her all the time. It is so strange what has happened. I have maintained NC except for very short to the point messages as we try to tie up a few remaining lose ends long distance. Probably the biggest help to me has been that after the breakup I was able to move to a different town in a new place. No memories lingering anywhere.
I am not sure how I feel anymore. I don't hurt so much anymore but I do feel empty and foggy on the inside. It's a strange feeling like there is a hole I need to plug.
Posted 4 months ago # -
willsucceed
offlineMemberBraxton, it was good to hear an update from you. Good job on maintaining NC. Remember that she will try very hard now and in the future to instigate you breaking it so that she can feel better about herself and also show she can exert control over you. I've heard from others that breaking away geographically also helps as you mentioned.
I think that for me, the pain of the absence of my ex in my life has two components. One is specific to him and one is that he was familiar. The familiar is a strong thing I've found--the one you turn to with good or interesting or bad everyday news. The specific person has good and bad traits and is less difficult than the fact that he was familiar and a part of my life for a long time.
I think not having someone familiar in your life is the strange feeling you mention (hole you need to plug). We are driven to want a significant, close relationship with someone and we actually put up with a LOT OF CRAP to have a semblance of that.
I've become closer to my friends and family and that helps, but I also know that I am familiar to me and that I will develop a new relationship with someone who becomes familiar. Because the want for the familiar is so strong, it behooves us all to choose that new person with great care and caution, even though we want to quickly have the familiar in our lives.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Braxton
offlineMemberI am doing pretty good this last week. At my new job I was having such a hard time focusing. But something sort of snapped in me this week. I don't feel I am pining over her any longer. Not to say I don't feel sad or don't think about her, but I am becoming much happier and ok being with just myself. I am no longer obsessed with getting her back, I don't fantasize about the day we get back together and I am slowly starting to believe that it wouldn't even be a good idea. I no longer check my phone hoping she contacted me. I'm happy being me.
I have had some limited contact with her. She had a few questions which I answered. But I never initiated any contact, never responded more than was necessary, didn't ask her any questions and didn't feel anything afterwards. I plan on continuing NC but I is amazing how far I have come with the support of everyone here. I never thought I would be happy just being alone and here I am. I have a ways to go but last week something snapped in me and I just started diving into my work and personal life. I put her on the back burner and shut off the gas. Hopefully I can keep this up. The good day by far outweigh the bad now. This is such a great place. Thanks to everyone
Posted 3 months ago #
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