How to Kick Loves Ass - Break Up Help Forum

How to Kick Loves Ass - Break Up Help Forum » Recent Posts http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Free Break up Help, Relationship Advice, and Break up Survival Plan en-US Wed, 22 Feb 2012 21:47:21 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/search.php julie on "Is alcohol consumption prolonging your healing?" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/is-alcohol-consumption-prolonging-your-healing#post-56732 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 14:35:22 +0000 julie 56732@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ I did drink at the beginning of break up. Funny my ex said (once we were playing a game about couples) that if I would be in depression I would drink all the time. Well F you, it's not like that <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> I haven't since I send NC (it really shifts something (and it was hard to do)), this evening I'm drinking again, but what the hell <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_biggrin.gif" title=":D" class="bb_smilies" /> I can drink once in a while <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> It's hard to tell when it becomes a problem. My dad is alcoholic and he always have told me that it's a big possibility I will become one. And he can go and .... I believe if I follow LOA, if I will be able to quit smoking, if I will be able to get over break up. I can do anything! I think it's ok to drink once in a while as long as it doesn't happen everyday. Sometimes we just need to relax, and alcohol does that. I just suggest to not break NC! And also there is difference between drinking and being drunk. Sorry if I cant help with this about my evolution, I'm not here for such a long time, bet let's keep kicking our ex ass <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Finding_Myself_Again on "where are u all from?" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/where-are-u-all-from/page/3#post-56731 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 13:50:43 +0000 Finding_Myself_Again 56731@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ New Mexico Finding_Myself_Again on "Is alcohol consumption prolonging your healing?" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/is-alcohol-consumption-prolonging-your-healing#post-56730 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 13:49:27 +0000 Finding_Myself_Again 56730@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ I have realized today that I am hindering my own evolution. Since the breakup, I have had one two drinks (vodka & whatever) to help my sleep. It has become a routine very easily. I have to stop escaping into my own little safe place at night, I need to feel it ALL of it sober. I’ve become dependent on it to sleep every night. This is only hurting me mentally and physically. I found that I have turned down some friends offers to socialize so I can escape to my safe place. I am dumping it all out tonight. I’m not going to drink at home alone anymore, it’s too easy to get lost there. I feel I will be more productive and clear headed. I need to be at my strongest mentally and physically, no more lying to myself. Time to take a cold hard look at my life. My actions speak louder than my words. Just curious as to how alcohol has played in other people going through their evolutions. LCommander on "LCommander's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56729 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 11:31:20 +0000 LCommander 56729@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Thanks Scott! I have to keep in mind reality is what I make of it, so if I have a positive outlook then positive things will be the result of it. julie on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56728 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 11:21:51 +0000 julie 56728@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ I'm still in my positive mode. Reading The Power also helps <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> And as strange as it is quitting smoking helps too. OK I think I never been really addicted to smoking, but I really liked to smoke <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> And it's not that hard to not smoke, but in the same time it keeps my mind busy, so I have less time to think about my ex. And I also like that feeling that I'm finally doing it, not only all the time waiting for the right time to quit. For every single thing what we want to do RIGHT NOW IS THE RIGHT TIME (OK it doesn't include breaking NC <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_mrgreen.gif" title=":mrgreen:" class="bb_smilies" /> ) And I'm working out daily, I started my thesis this week, so that will keep me busy as well. I used to be this positive always smiling person, but it somehow went away in past years. I was just so stuck and overwhelmed with my problems, that I let this part of me go away. And now reading more and more about LOA I can see that my concentration on problems just led to more problems. And I want to break that circle. admin on "SMILE2DAY'S NC DIARY" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/smile2days-nc-diary#post-56727 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 11:12:48 +0000 admin 56727@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>SMILE2DAY <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/smile2days-nc-diary#post-56723">said</a>:</cite> Did I come across too harsh with the email, I don't want to come across as a complete insensitive cow, after all I broke up with him, I haven't spoken to him almost 2 months now I am only contacting him for my money. Should I have asked him how he is and made some small talk. </blockquote> No, you weren't harsh, and you don't have to kiss his ass to get your money back, in fact he should have made repayment arrangements by now if he was an honorable person. Obviously he isn't very honorable. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> Kiss that money good-bye, consider it a paid lesson in life, and move forward, the longer you dwell on the past, the longer you stay stuck in it. Stay Strong and Positive! <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rambo.gif" title=":rambo:" class="bb_smilies" /> julie on "LCommander's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56726 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 11:10:46 +0000 julie 56726@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Exactly! It's a great thing to do..you don't need to think at that moment, it gives you accomplishment feeling after, you look better and you start to feel better and more confident as well <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> But I know sometimes it's hard to find something what to do. It happens with me as well. And that's why here are people to remind us why we are here and give some suggestions as well. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rambo.gif" title=":rambo:" class="bb_smilies" /> admin on "LCommander's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56725 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 11:04:44 +0000 admin 56725@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>LCommander <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56719">said</a>:</cite> Is there any way to stop feeling/thinking like this? </blockquote> There are always ways to help yourself if you concentrate/focus on a solution, and not the absence of a solution. Caving in to your fears is never the answer, the best way to pull yourself out of a negative place is with gratitude, be grateful for what you have now, why? If you are not grateful you will not feel happy, and if you don't feel happy you will only attract more negative things into your life. Everyone has tons of things to be grateful for if you really think about it...focus on creating "a state of gratitude" instead of breaking NC. Make a long list of everything you have to be grateful for in your life right now, and then go listen to (or read) the power, that helps me. It is normal to feel happy and sad during your life, but when you get stuck in "the sad/fearful mode", you have to get your ass out of it, or it will suck you down like quicksand. If there is any mode you "want to get stuck in" it is the happy mode, then your life will become amazing. Stay Strong and Positive! <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rambo.gif" title=":rambo:" class="bb_smilies" /> LCommander on "LCommander's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56724 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:59:49 +0000 LCommander 56724@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Thanks julie, I've been exercising more frequently ever since the break up and as a result, I've lost weight which is a huge confidence booster! SMILE2DAY on "SMILE2DAY'S NC DIARY" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/smile2days-nc-diary#post-56723 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:58:00 +0000 SMILE2DAY 56723@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Did I come across too harsh with the email, I don't want to come across as a complete insensitive cow, after all I broke up with him, I haven't spoken to him almost 2 months now I am only contacting him for my money. Should I have asked him how he is and made some small talk. I am beginning to feel a bit bad now. Anyway I wont over think I will hit the gym, want to look good for my date. SMILE2DAY on "SMILE2DAY'S NC DIARY" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/smile2days-nc-diary#post-56722 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:36:11 +0000 SMILE2DAY 56722@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ By the way KMRCFT is slang!! it means KISSING MY RASS CLART TEETH its a noise people make when they are upset or not in a good mood... I just found out. SMILE2DAY on "SMILE2DAY'S NC DIARY" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/smile2days-nc-diary#post-56721 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:28:54 +0000 SMILE2DAY 56721@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Hi Marie21 So I took your advice, it sounded smart. I haven't been feeling too strong the last few days but Im just getting on with life. Also I have decided to rearrange that date with the guy friend. I will give it a chance, who knows we may click. This is the message I wrote to my ex Hi, please can you pay me the money you owe me. These are my accounts details. Thanks. His reply was Fuck off! Is that all you contacted me for KMRCFT!!! I was surprised by his reply, he must still be hurting. He must of expected me to chase after him, but I am not. I ignored the text. I guess Im not getting my money back then. I'll just have to let that go. It sucks though because its a bit of money and the whole relationship I spend way too much money on him anyway. Hopefully I'll get better riches. julie on "LCommander's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56720 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:25:43 +0000 julie 56720@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Stay strong! Maybe do some workout, go to gym or go run or do what ever active. It usually helps me. It takes so much energy while you are doing that, that there is nothing left for thinking. Plan to go out with some of your friends I also would suggest something active. This is like the first aid <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> then of course positive thinking. And remember you are in control right now with your NC, don't give it up! LCommander on "LCommander's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/lcommanders-nc-diary#post-56719 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:17:08 +0000 LCommander 56719@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ I'm feeling really weak right now, tempted to make the call since its a week long school break! But I know it would satisfy a temporary feeling and bring down months work. Is there any way to stop feeling/thinking like this? I've been trying to go out often and take whatever chance I can to get out of the house but it seems like holidays/breaks are the worst when you have so much free time. I would honestly want school to come now. Anything to take my mind off of this. LCommander on "where are u all from?" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/where-are-u-all-from/page/3#post-56718 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 10:13:22 +0000 LCommander 56718@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Toronto, Canada! AngeLBeaR on "Depressed Ex's" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/depressed-exs#post-56717 Wed, 22 Feb 2012 00:36:37 +0000 AngeLBeaR 56717@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ in my personal point of view, no matter if he is depressed or not, it doesn't concern about me. I am putting myself first. sound's selfish/harsh? Look who's left me to bleed and expecting me to heal on my own at the first place. admin on "Fenix's NC diary." http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/fenixs-nc-diary#post-56716 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 22:36:54 +0000 admin 56716@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>fenix <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/fenixs-nc-diary#post-56712">said</a>:</cite> Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated. Fenix. </blockquote> Here is some great advice, you should have not broken NC, and you should have asked for advice BEFORE you fucked up, and broke NC too early. Our forum is of little use when you ignore it until you after you make a mistake. You are NOT following the free plan, or using our forum correctly, so what's the point of being a member? Buh-bye! <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wave.gif" title=":wave:" class="bb_smilies" /> admin on "Musicmaker's NC diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/musicmakers-nc-diary#post-56715 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 22:30:34 +0000 admin 56715@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>Musicmaker <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/nc-and-when-they-text-you-thoughts-please#post-56711">said</a>:</cite> I think this is a pretty vague text and it did leave me a little confused as to why he sent it. Is it really just his way of having the last word. It really did not even seem to want a response...... So why send it? did my NC message make him want to text me? Now, I mentioned to my girlfriend that I received such text And she said, that by sending the NC message, I was actually daring him to respond. If i did not really want him to contact me, i should have just stopped all communications, not responded to phone calls and texts and that would be a better method. </blockquote> Once again....it doesn't matter what your ex says or does, this is about getting your life back, not psychoanalyzing your fucking (clinically depressed) ex boyfriend. It seems to me that you do not have any faith in the free plan and what you're doing, otherwise you wouldn't feel the need to question it constantly. This will only result in you posting crap like this constantly and cluttering up our forum with useless (stupid) questions. Unless, of course, I decide to stop you. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_twisted.gif" title=":twisted:" class="bb_smilies" /> Since you value your friends advice more than the advice you are getting here in our forum, I think you should stick with what you trust, your friend's advice. Buh-bye! <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wave.gif" title=":wave:" class="bb_smilies" /> admin on "NC and when they text you -thoughts please" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/nc-and-when-they-text-you-thoughts-please#post-56714 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 22:21:02 +0000 admin 56714@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>Marie21 <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/nc-and-when-they-text-you-thoughts-please#post-56713">said</a>:</cite> The truth is you have no idea about why the text was sent, and neither does anyone else here cause we aren't mind readers. I know, we'd all like to be, and I definately wanted to be at the start of my NC journey. I highly recommend you don't discuss NC with anyone outside this forum. Most people don't understand your friend doesn't understand that just dropping contact doesn't make one feel better. </blockquote> <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_iagree.gif" title=":iagree:" class="bb_smilies" /> Marie21 on "NC and when they text you -thoughts please" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/nc-and-when-they-text-you-thoughts-please#post-56713 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 21:01:54 +0000 Marie21 56713@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ First, you need to post these questions in your NC Diary. I don't know that anyone's been banned for creating too many documents but Scott tends to frown on it. If you want to be sure someone answers your questions send a pm to your buddy's and/or Scott to look at your diary. The truth is you have no idea about why the text was sent, and neither does anyone else here cause we aren't mind readers. I know, we'd all like to be, and I definately wanted to be at the start of my NC journey. I highly recommend you don't discuss NC with anyone outside this forum. Most people don't understand, your friend doesn't understand that just dropping contact doesn't make one feel better. You need to DO something to take back control, then you feel better. That's what the NC message does for us. Also, by just dropping contact your ex might get the wrong message: that you are mad at them or that you never want to talk to them again. In the message you stated exactly what you wanted: them to not contact you while you make some big decisions, and that you'll be in touch when you're ready. You weren't daring him to do anything, you were politely asking him to not contact you. His curiosity is rather rude since he's not respecting your wishes. fenix on "Fenix's NC diary." http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/fenixs-nc-diary#post-56712 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 20:36:57 +0000 fenix 56712@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Wow... It has been a long while since my last post. Well, things have been doing amazingly well with me. I survived that break up! Believe me, it is totally possible and now a real thing. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Well, he surprisedly showed up (texted) during Christmas time. He wanted to meet for a coffee or something. I turned it down after he said that he did not want to be that kind of guy who does not showed during Christmas. I wished him "Merry Christmas" but did not meet up with him. Again, he texted me before Valentines Day, asking how I was doing. I briefly said I was okay and not much was going on. He said if I wanted to meet up for Valentines Day, I said no, but I could be meeting for a coffee the day before. He said okay. We meet up, It was pretty enlightening, I can't deny. However, his flaws were even more apparent, which made me feel extremely sad. I still hold strong feelings for him. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_sad.gif" title=":(" class="bb_smilies" /> Last Friday we had lunch. It was good and everything. But we haven't had anything yet, we never kissed or anything after the break up over 6 months ago. It is hard because I still miss the good things of that relationship and it hurts to see him without even touching him, but I did not feel like doing anything but wait. By the time I got back home last Friday, I got an invite from a common friend, inviting me for a party where he is supposed to attend. Should I make it there? I feel like not showing up. I think it is too much closeness in a short period of time. I am slightly confused about the whole thing. We are just starting back. I feel like if I rush into things now, I wont have time to closely analyze where I am getting in. He has not contacted me since last Friday. Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated. Fenix. Musicmaker on "NC and when they text you -thoughts please" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/nc-and-when-they-text-you-thoughts-please#post-56711 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 20:05:08 +0000 Musicmaker 56711@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ So, 6 days ago I sent the exact NC message. Today, my ex texted me the following text. Mind you, I do not plan to respond. Hi. I was thinking about you and hope your rehab is going well and that you are also doing well. (I had knee surgery and the rehab pertains to my PT.) I think this is a pretty vague text and it did leave me a little confused as to why he sent it. Is it really just his way of having the last word. It really did not even seem to want a response...... So why send it? did my NC message make him want to text me? Now, I mentioned to my girlfriend that I received such text And she said, that by sending the NC message, I was actually daring him to respond. If i did not really want him to contact me, i should have just stopped all communications, not responded to phone calls and texts and that would be a better method. I was creating curiosity in him by sending the message, and he would curious enough to send a text anyways. I find that very interesting. any thoughts or insight, would be appreciated. julie on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56710 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 18:27:32 +0000 julie 56710@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ And you are right! As always. I'm here for myself, for my life. And past is past, and it should stay in past. Thanks for kicking my ass <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> admin on "Marie21's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/marie21s-nc-diary/page/2#post-56709 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 16:51:21 +0000 admin 56709@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>Marie21 <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/marie21s-nc-diary/page/2#post-56697">said</a>:</cite> <blockquote>Holding on is being brave, but moving on is often what makes us stronger. - via <a href="http://www.marcandangel.com/" rel="nofollow">http://www.marcandangel.com/</a></blockquote> </blockquote> Holding on isn't "being brave", it is being afraid, afraid to let go, afraid to face the truth. Facing your fear (the truth) is what makes you stronger. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> admin on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56708 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 16:42:00 +0000 admin 56708@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>julie <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56707">said</a>:</cite> And I want to see him for myself, to see is there still some emotions in me for him, </blockquote> OK, this is another shoo-in for the real lame-ass excuse to break NC hall of fame. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_banghead.gif" title=":banghead:" class="bb_smilies" /> What does it matter if you still have emotions for him or not? You are supposed to be here to get your life back, not your ex. This plan will not work if you are here for the wrong reasons. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cool.gif" title="8)" class="bb_smilies" /> Stay Strong (realistic) and Positive! <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_rambo.gif" title=":rambo:" class="bb_smilies" /> julie on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56707 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 16:09:39 +0000 julie 56707@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Thanks LCommander. I feel less and less downs than ups, but I know exactly what you mean. Right now I don't see any reason why to break NC and plus I'm quite stubborn as well, so that helps <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> So far the best thing for myself which I have found is just not think about him (like that is so easy) Every time when I start to think about him I ask myself "Do you need this?" answer of course always is "No" Then I try to find some other thing to think about. Seems stupid, but it works better with everyday. Only thing which I do is I still look forward to seeing him, when I will return at home for one week in April. I know until then I will accomplish a lot of things. And I want to see him for myself, to see is there still some emotions in me for him, and in the same time I plan to look outstanding <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> But don't take this the wrong way. Everything I do now I do for myself and not for him. julie on "Marie21's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/marie21s-nc-diary/page/2#post-56706 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 15:54:41 +0000 julie 56706@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ <blockquote><cite>takingitback <a href="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/marie21s-nc-diary/page/2#post-56700">said</a>:</cite> Couldn't agree more with your last post and reading it inspires me. The link is kick ass too, thanks Marie21 <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> </blockquote> you just wrote my exact thoughts. Thanks! LCommander on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56705 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 14:42:06 +0000 LCommander 56705@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Hi julie, just a few words of advice. It is inevitable you are going to feel some ups and downs, one day youre really happy the next really sad. It happens to me and its been 1.5 months of NC. But whatever you do, dont break NC! You will feel really good about yourself for sticking it through. julie on "Musicmaker's NC diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/musicmakers-nc-diary#post-56704 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 12:54:48 +0000 julie 56704@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ I truly suggest LOA as I believe does everyone here. It just brings different perspective to our everyday life, and we can start to heal and accept break up. And have a great trip! You deserve it! julie on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56703 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 12:48:51 +0000 julie 56703@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ So today I made a new challenge for myself <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> I quit smoking! <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> Maybe now I need my NC smoking diary <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> And I still feel good, and I look better and feel better everyday! And I wish for all of you the same feeling. And to the sentence stay strong and positive I would add also calm <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_wink.gif" title=";)" class="bb_smilies" /> P.S. Thanks takingitback for your encouraging words <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_thumright.gif" title=":thumright:" class="bb_smilies" /> Musicmaker on "Musicmaker's NC diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/musicmakers-nc-diary#post-56702 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 09:46:20 +0000 Musicmaker 56702@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Day 6 of NC. I had a breakthrough yesterday afternoon after reading some of the posts about LOA. I am getting the Power from the library today. I think I actually get what LOA and what we are doing here is all about. I made affirmations about sending love out to my husband, during this very wretched divorce, my children, my family, and my ex. It felt so good. I didn't have pain in my chest at all in the afternoon or evening. I woke to feel very hopeful about my life and it's future, NOT how my future was going to be with my ex. I am taking steps to start my new life, which I am soooooo excited for after the divorce (well, really now, considering there is no going back on this divorce. <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_thumbup.gif" title=":thumbup:" class="bb_smilies" /> ). I have been looking for a townhouse for me to move into June or July 1 (my husband wants to buy the house from me), I am starting to look for another part-time job to supplement what I already have. In a couple of weeks,, the divorce process will actually start moving.... Right now, we are in divorce limbo - which totally sucks. Lastly, I am going to check out some dating prospects. Nothing serious, but just to have fun. I am also working on me - I am doing journalling, seeing my shrink, and reading, reading, reading many self-help books. I am losing weight. I am 4'11". Prior to my accident, I was 103, but without all of the activity, I gained 6-7 pounds. I am working very hard to be more diligent in my eating and activity. I have already lost 2 pounds, which is hard, when there is no hard core exercising I can do yet. I am joining power house so i can take weight classes until I can start tennis and figure skating again in the middle of June. Lastly, I am taking my daughter to NYC on Thursday for the long weekend (they have break). My husband is taking my son to Chicago for the same break. My younger brother lives there in the upper east side with his wife and kids. He just had #2 in October and we are going to see him and the baby. I love NYC. I go at least once a year. That should be such a great trip and an amazing boost to my mood (which is tremendously better). Things are looking up......except it just started snowing (ugh). I hate Detroit and the winters here. The snow is sticking....... <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_cry.gif" title=":cry:" class="bb_smilies" /> lunapearl on "Willsucceed's NC diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/willsucceeds-nc-diary/page/7#post-56701 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 02:44:58 +0000 lunapearl 56701@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ hi ws, have you read both books? what do you think? takingitback on "Marie21's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/marie21s-nc-diary/page/2#post-56700 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 01:22:31 +0000 takingitback 56700@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Couldn't agree more with your last post and reading it inspires me. The link is kick ass too, thanks Marie21 <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" /> takingitback on "NCMan01's NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/ncman01s-nc-diary#post-56699 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 01:18:43 +0000 takingitback 56699@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Take the anger and bitterness that keeps on trying to claw and crawl back into your life, open the door, and give them both a swift, hard kick in the ass, OUT of your life. The justice that you've been searching for cannot be found in her nor her acknowledgements or actions. It's in you. It's in you taking back your life, you taking back control of your emotions and your happiness. There is power and justice in all of that and that's what I'm striving for. I'm only a week behind you in NC and I've had good days and some days where my mind seemed to wander as well. Still, I know that as long as I keep on moving forward, even when my mind takes me a few steps back, I'm still moving forward. I can think back a few weeks ago when I was so consumed by feelings of anger and injustice, but I realized that the true injustice was me holding on to those feelings and letting them drag me down through mud, dirt, and quicksand. So I let go. I let them all go. And I started to finally feel freedom. I began to feel strength, power, and control. It started as a little seed, but that seed is there. It has a long way to grow, but I am going to choose to water the seed that represents my life- a happy, amazing, positive life, and not the nasty weeds that threaten to surround it. Keep strong NCMan01. You can do this and we've all got some great support and friends in here backing us up. We will get there, no doubt. takingitback on "Julies NC Diary" http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/topic/julies-nc-diary#post-56698 Tue, 21 Feb 2012 00:21:28 +0000 takingitback 56698@http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/ Keep that spirit up Julie! Focus on yourself and continue to surround yourself with positivity <img src="http://www.howtokicklovesass.com/my-plugins/bb-smilies/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" />